keatsly

when it happens to be love

2011-09-08T12:58:00.000-07:00

Some times it doth happen to be love, just as it rained anyway!
Asked of none, yet, bliss shall do it all fair
Jeering into eyes, sharply flying times and this madness untold
Holdin' thy own hands, walk it in isles of love
Solitary it be although, rhythm and meter doth follow not
When love is, loneliness will and ride to test
Thy strength of being yet not living, ugly selves bear it too
Unturned, unsolicited, cometh vanity as dancers in
Prostituted homes, of trained expressions
Shameless to excite, yet be called for

June 2010

Happy !!

2011-08-29T10:01:00.000-07:00

LIFE IS SO BEAUTIFUL !!! ITS RIGHT HERE AND RIGHT NOW !!

Placid lakes, and stand still water
Oars weave fabrics for altar
Should nothing change ?
Yet ride the waves, That's so strange !

True as well, she whirled to bow
Greeting smiles holy so!
Racing none, traveling slow
Far ahead of worlds ye know

If peace a strife were chased this day
I reached, I reached, I found and found
Am Happy and Gay, now bless me may
And bless me hay ! I'll love the sound

Of chirping birds and creaking friends
Rain, thunder, showers and bunds
of grass and sand on tides who roar
not ye worry am not ashore

Safe on tides and gushing waters
Roars wear those shining stars
Should night befall and nothing change ?

Yet ride the waves. That is so strange !

Anecdotal ... or ... a-no-ny-mous

2011-07-09T02:39:00.000-07:00

I was trying to log into this blog, have been forgetting my passwords for the umpteenth time, as always. I tracked back the number of e-mail Ids I had, and for the silliest memories I have, I made an attempt to recover some too... futile... I gasped at the list of email Ids I lost access to, or I never used even once, after creation, for I cannot remember passwords.

Lest, I logged into this one successfully :), to blog my musings about this musical show, MTV Coke studio, that lifted my spirits. Shanky is TOO GOOD. Idly at home, pondering over what should my priorities have been, to have avoided some situations... this was a treat. When I thought priorities, it decisively turned out to be "I". Being a Jack of trades, and expecting to be taken care of, than taking care of myself, I let health lose somewhere, rather everywhere. The only sincere piece of advice, rather a pleading request I carry is "Take care of yourself".

All this while, in the past, having time, always meant giving it to the others, and not having it meant, trying to make time, or simply remember to oneself, the good souls and wish them a great life. But not that anymore. Having time, means taking care of myself, and simply remember to wish goodness to everyone around and not so around.

But I did not get selfish, I did try reaching out to some good old friends. No responses or strange responses, glad responses, and bonding responses. Of those to left, I said to myself with a contended smile, "things do change and the charm of a relationship does get lost, nevertheless I tried :)". It did hurt for coldness, but I don't regret, as I turned my back on many and everything else for long, balancing the act of focussing on, "MY LIFE" .... And I am happy to be where I am today!

The best of my friends' are those who know me too well. One said "You are like a butterfly, happy to help and always on the move, finding those who need your presence, wearing a mask, hiding yourself, not ready to depend on anyone, you are always there, yet lonely within and hence I cannot expect to hold on to you, for it would hurt your smiles and block your goals of helping others succeed in their success". I always remember that there is someone who captured me picture perfect. No more to ask for, and it stands by me all my life.

To some this may seem insincere a friend, and to some unrelaible... who I also call childish and immature. I have to say.. if you who carry a wrath or wriggle, has to heal your life, be sincere to yourself, connect to your inner self, express boldly than disguise. For unexpressed, and unaddressed thoughts make one anonymous to self, and say, "Its my way or high way". With no pretext to notes, a philosopher, I write.... One can always be sincere to itself, first, by being honest and bold !!

At the fist of it, I tried to think of names or people, to whom i have been insincere to, and my consience says, "NONE", SO BOLDLY !! The melancholy poet, rose again, to speak. Hurt, is a relative term. Emotions too, are thoughts manufatured, and manifested at our own will. So, I willingly let go of all.

And to myself, I say, I hope, not to cause insincere experiences to people. I stopped committing to friendships new, for, I already found my treasure, the best I have. I let go of all who cared not to wait and watch, with all the space in this world. Being called someone's friend, and accepting someone as a friend, are two different things. I call very few, my friends. I will always call them my friends, irrespective of what they think of me :) .. For they are my greatest strength !

No new names would appear than those who made me write these blogs and be remembered on these pages.... They alone are my friends, for they would know my reasons and behaviour, untold, They, who confront, correct and communicate. I am glad, I can bask in the glory of their memories, support, prayers and existence. A friend of mine, simply said, "You can't be good to all .. all the time.... And being sincere to 'whom' , is also your choice". I know, he was right, and I chose my family and friends for it. I abide by it. Dedicating this time for anonymity, is only to comfort a soul so hurt, myself. For, I intended, never to hurt none!

What goes, comes around :) ... and I am not walking far to deduce..

A passer by spake, I reckon melancholy, but not faces it hide!
To who who lunge, dream possession, comes it not of yen in hide
Chastity sought demeanors perceptions, who live agile a life
Arrangements and lives happen not together, unless divine a strife
For who who lie on wounded ways, and tried to woo or wade,
I slit through courage swindles many. Thus, goodriddance I bade!

To malady, I toast, a loathing life, of trust, fulfillment, and deeds well done,
Of a man I belong, august a self, to love and live, to who I am the only one!
This me is not it is isn't? unbothered, unconquered, sublime and submitted!
To the world so comely, of people and presence I am gifted to befitted

AllBookstores.com

2011-01-30T23:57:00.000-08:00

AllBookstores.com

Man and Woman, as friends

2010-12-28T04:16:00.000-08:00

Female Vs Girl friends, and Male Vs Boy friends, an interesting, and a very sensitive topic. I had this post drafted for a while, and just thought Will let the cat out. Its just a perspective, no incidents or characters are imbibed. I have many more drafts, like this one, pending attention to be edited for language and style. Looking at the diversity of friends around me, most of them, being men, I am sure, I am eligible to speak.

With the trust, that I have, and will always give, all the due respect to my male friends, I begin to speak here, in an attempt to record my observations, for men, who want to understand their world and be better.

What women look for, in this world, is a space to grow, an opportunity to exhibit their talents, acknowledgment and encouragement for it from their peers, who have been doing it for yeas. An environment, which does not make them feel weak or exposed. A place where, men don't treat her as an object. A place where she is not forced to allow rubbings on their skin, as a price to be accepted as an equal. It is said, men of quality, never fear women seeking equality. Now quality is a very very large commitment to life. But not very difficult to manage. It simply is a foot away, when needed !

Every relationship grows and matures, reaches stages where friends of opposite sex begin to feel indispensable about each other. Some choose to make this relationship work in a marriage, while others remain as they are. Some choose to flirt safely with friends of opposite sex, for they are confident of not crossing limits. Still claims respect, for the level of trust they bear. The latter requires, maturity and bold / frank discussions about how you feel about someone, at some weak moments. It is biological, and there is nothing to feel shy about it. Both men and women must be able to accept these gracefully as compliments and should be strong enough to let go of these, laugh over these as a simple joke. This increases respect for each other. It takes trust to discuss this, a bit of courage, and definitely, values.

Some, express these subtly, and want to acknowledge, give due respects, and move it towards the next level of relationship, where, love as in affection, becomes, love as in love. Beauty !! Some stand apart, turning these into admiration for the other. They never lead the other into a spree of discomfort by their bold act of friendship.

Now to the sad part, some hide this, from their friends, thinking that the other doesn't know (or) realise the vibrations. So foolish, of assuming you aren't watched by your friend, who probably knows you more than you think.

Lets grow up, be open and frank, create a happier communicated and connected world :) !!

Interesting reads

2010-12-28T02:58:00.000-08:00

Found this somewhere, and thought it might be a good trivia to share. Suppose the average human life in today's world is 60 years, and we analysed the break-up of activities associated with these 60 years of life, One can see that it more or less matches with this. What remains is a balance of 4 Years ..... The only question to one and all is, why should mankind think, involve in activities that result in sufferings, terror, hatred, fighting, killings etc... in the short span of 4 years left to them. It needs to be utilized in a better way by doing all good things, helping others and thanking God for the opportunity given to us in being a human being... Live and Let Live !

Music Concerts

2010-04-04T04:01:00.000-07:00

Sri Rama Seva Mandali music concerts 2010. Hope this serves as valuable entertainment to music loving bangaloreans!

Economy Today - A few reads

2009-10-09T08:05:00.000-07:00

No bank closures in India, no bankruptcies declared, but the US seems to be going through a very tough time. No recruitment, and no spending !! What a pity !!

From an Indian, in whose country, there are millions who sleep in hunger and dwell on footpaths, with no sight of money whensoever !! How does it matter to us, who never saw any overwhelming progression, who never experienced international funds poured at every citizen's feet for no takers even at zero interests ?!?!?

Neways, philosophy aside, news to be watched and jabbed about is just below (may help, or may be stupid as always, but am just trying to catch up with every bit of professional reading required) -

Updates from REUTERS on Banks' closure in 2009 in the USA show numbers close to a 100 banks. Most of them were small ones, started with RICH MEN's private funds, or society banks sector (akin to cooperative banks in India) and analysts predict that this time, its a W-SHAPED ECONOMIC RECOVERY FOR USA. While Sub-prime and real estate have taken their pills in the first bend of the W, it seems to be the turn of Commercial Real Estates to Wreck the US economy, next. Why not ? In a layman's terms, "workers first, the employer is next" !

But what could be The impact of COMMERCIAL REAL ESTATE FALLOUT on / in INDIA ?
Asking myself...

Probably good -because we become the obvious choice of alternate options and RELATIVELY cheaper infrastructure (are we ready yet ??),
Probably bad - That involved parties to be building infrastructure for India, have had a good brunch off this followed by a blissful nap, losing on project time lines and the time value of money ???

While US is in distress and INDIA resides in a conservative / calculated risk mode, (for, we cannot afford to lag or recede any more ! ) CHINA is having an IPO PARTY reported by a CHINESE DAILY

Enjoy !!

Words on a bungled barricade !

2009-10-07T02:33:00.001-07:00

Dreams battle its strife, of this, a loathing life
Illness beams as distant cousin, to souls within
Whence thou stand un-erect in fears, of mirrors
Lonesome wanderer despises forlorn, as I mourn !

Cloaked are the bounty and plush, as rivers gush,
Raking for prosperity, I pay prostrate posterity
Unknown, unseen, let go of dreams fine, in vain
I sulk and pass, in company of tines, and wines

Good ones !!

2009-08-06T11:48:00.000-07:00

I skimmed through my bulky mail boxes, trying to replicate 30% of it, to meet IBM standards ;) and found this ...

Work-life balance

A funda that is only given to those who don't balance their life in the hope that they don't do it eventually !!

Now, to the background - A good old friend of mine, Amit, and I had a discussion over an internal communications channel at office, on 03 May 2007, about my grievances of how my inspiring Mr.perfect boss, was always so pro-employee, yet smartly adjudged people based on the ability and interest to stretch... in turn, the topic was work-life balance.... lets leave aside my personal grumblings about being inspired by such people :P I was ashamed, to be caught of less, rather low hanging fruits
The conversation is here ... only to record it, and not to bore through your precious time, may only be pass-time read, I warn...
LN... X ne usey bahut sawal kiye .. (X had been my most favorite boss till then)... sare sawalon se mujhe yehi dikh raha that ki ye ladka kitna stretch karega; which means all managements recruit with the expectation that the person shd stretch & then its nice to give funda about work life balance??
Amit P C... thats the top most requrement... agreed with u
LN... buri baath nahin hai, yet another hypocrite ? (shocked at the revelation, but not an innocent response)
APC... that funda is only given to those who don't balance their life in the hope that they dont do it eventually
LN... thats just ultimate !!
Widom Quote to those who shell red fuel, in the name of Lord stretch and extra mil(l)er

Till date, there hasn't been a better quote on this that I know of ... lol !

Dormants' blabber

2009-06-24T05:20:00.000-07:00

In melancholy mood, for reasons none but causes a plenty, plentiful I.

Learning French part-time, settling into a routine life !

Unwandering, I stand by shores,
Awaken, I await my oars
To steer life by commands
Of all, that my soul demands !
At loss of words, as dear delusions erode
In despondents' war, derision will corrode

I would love to add my five cents to philosophy, and the knowledge about karma. Since it has been attempted well at advaita, I won't duplicate further. If we are all running towards attaining naishkarmya (state of being actionlessness - attaining mukti), and are looking to evade the viscious cycle of actions and reactions, (karma and karma-phala), then my dormancy is well justified :) .. While trying to be dormant, I am trying not to act. Thus, letting time take over me. Am I attaining salvation through short-cuts ?

Jokes apart, there is a different meaning to naishkarmya. One has to fulfill all the lawful duties of the body, society and the supremem power (i..e,soul). This is referred to as karma-yoga. Once a person attains karma yoga, salvation is duly blesssed when one exhibits inactivity, tapasya and bhakti. Attaining karma-yoga is every individual's dharma.

There lies the catch, dispossession and actionless presence, take one, closer to God. But he wouldn't accept you before you fulfill your assigned duties either. While expending your duties, if you did slip off your track, salvation walks farther away from you. Indeed, it is a great feat in itself, to attain salvation.

Caught between the understanding of karma and dharma, I wander, in search of the ultimate truth, awaiting death, expecting salvation and expending a dutiful life. At times as this, I can only sing this to myself, "punarapi jananam, punarapi maranam!" .. verse off Bhajagovindam

Leaving it incomplete and unspoken, for my duty at work, invites me to my karma !

P.S - I quit drinking, a few months ago, so this ain't hangover math!

June 23rd' Happy Birthday Eyoks !

Materialism and Unconditional love

2009-04-01T11:35:00.000-07:00

Gluttoning across the table with my best friend around, is all I do, when I am in company of extreme emotions, trying to laugh it away in anything less than alcohol fervor, yes, the ice cream mania solves it all... barely managed 500 ml of ice cream today, seemed heavy against triple its volume that I can normally beat my stomach upto... !

Undigressing, I know am solitaire this hour, in company of myself, after a long time, thinking aloud, explaining to myself, all the unanswered questions being nocturn !

Materialism believes "matter is the only reality", and unconditional, means unrestricted and boundless according to Oxford and Webster.

Now, what do they mean to me? Every action word has its own protocols, Am only trying to find my vertices within the large scope of languages. In short, taking the easy way out.

Is it humanly possible ot love someone unconditionally? in this materialistic world? may be yes and may be not... I too say, and feel as well, yet, the word "want" magnifies the hypocrite in me. (m listening to this song now.. ) .. Wanting from / of the other is a double edged sword, in a relationship that epitomises togetherness, intimacy and dependence ... When someone says "I love you", it means that they wish., and are sincerely trying to unlearn themselves to love you unconditionally. Successful at times and not so sometimes. Expecting this in action, in its entirety, is the first mistake people do. I know for sure that actions are stronger expressions than mere words, but shredding the material world and walking into boundless love does take time.
Music changed to Sudie's favorite, just one of everything I like about him and his likes.

Rambling !

2009-04-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

Expectations management is fun. I remember having attended the character pattern making class a few years ago.. they told me i am a task master and focus too much on tasks.. list making, and sticking to the list are all that matters to such men and women.. who lose sight of emoitions and care for people, while looking for data :P whatte fun daar ji ! but my lists always remained incomplete and unfinished !

Stargazing artisan, am I !

2009-01-23T23:42:00.000-08:00

Every letter in here should be kept off eyes of pervert.. try crackin’ this, and I know ;)

Too fast may be too furious

2008-10-04T08:53:00.000-07:00

How can accidents and I be so inseparable? A bulged eye, after the stair-fall. I did not realise the pain it could cause. Managing to read, rather reading more, to ensure that my eyes are in good form.

Guess I haven't gone eccentric yet, with the big bang on my head. People were even making fun of me, asking for the enlightenment note. Hence, to justify, being the good old victim of great times, this blog won't find posts quite until am ready to look into bright objects for long enough. Since, work gives ample opportunity to do so everyday, I better be off this white board. Enjoyed the management training days, immersed in classrooms (definitely sleeping :P )

Paranoid mom, started on a temple routine, as usual, it was Trichy, Tirupathi and Kancheevaram. I guess these rounds are off. Managed to sneak time off the Trichy trip, to attend Balajee's wedding.

Being free of mobile phones, is another relief. My mom warrants custody of my phone, since I have not been able to fulfill simple procedures at BSNL, when we shifted to our new home :P She was absolutely irritated the very first week, with the number of "responsibility" calls on my mobile phone! She came close to me, and said, "I think i need to do something child, This is not the level of stress children go through at your age (mind it.. she said children.. "she" did, and not me). She really did the trick, of being my personal telephone assistant. She is still. I managed to buy a phone and a new phone number. Hope to share it with friends, once activated. Glad, mom learnt to use a mobile phone !

So if you do / did want to find me, I was and am still finding solace in books and sleep. Unusual times, I am sleeping for looooooooong hours. Did skip a couple of CSIM classes, but managed with the rest. But the sad part is, am still riding on weekends. Missing my sister, who'd have dropped me to my classes :(

I hate the Dollar country, for it steals many of our kith and kin, for the rude showcase of power it bears. But this is what is required, when the body keeps asking for rest & vacation, often sidelined for more burn-outs of life.

Interesting finds !

2008-08-21T11:38:00.000-07:00

Wow ! this favorite man of mine, blogs too ! But missing odakutthar mutt concert on Aug 14 was definitely a sin :(

So, here is RASIKA.ORG for those who want a global calendar of carnatic music events, filling in for the gaps on EVENTS BANGALORE. I wish I could have a single link for rock, ghazal, metal and carnatic music on the same page. Never mind, let me try to put one together :)

V V BAD DAY @ WORK ! Ti SuKx ! But that didn't stop me from reading poems and getting drenched in rain at chai break :) I read Annabel-lee :) This one is simple, yet a beautiful verse.

Unforgotten English - Syntax and semantics

Bad luck, and I are best friends forever - Ironically, there is none called bad luck. Luck can only go sick, but not bad :) It is either luck or ILL-LUCK.. theegache? :)

Thoughts -
There is beauty in simplicity, and, this joy is forever truly!

Diffidence Vs confidence, another good tree talk gyan on ToI.

Core responsibilities - Being the elder !

2008-08-19T11:28:00.000-07:00

Core responsibilities - very important for an elder child in the family. Unsure how letting go of things, comes so naturally to the sincere ones. I pity a great lot, who do not get to experience this umbilical relationship with the elder sibling, which includes me :( too!

Despite of being an elder one, some merely grab the advantage of being the first at the signal. The early bird advantage is so difficult to resist. But all one has to do is, remember, that "I, the elder can survive any where, irrespective of when I start, let me watch and give a chance to my kin". Remember - "social responsibilities and giving, begins at home !"

The elder one, is always considered next to the father. To rise and pull-up the family along, is a natural responsibility. Some, smart and capable indivduals of the rest of the family, make their way much higher than aimed at, adding to the buoyancy of the elder's support. Some of these, need the support and guidance. Some of these, just need to be let free, and like eagles they shall soar high, when they're lighter and free of burden. All it needs is time, that can only be given by the elder sibling, by taking a step back and letting the little ones try their flight without a plight.

All those who disagreed with me, at a heated argument this evening, at office, on this topic, following the trail of conversation about inhibitions of a relocation, were all elder siblings, who have been much more than I describe for an elder. Being a female, doesn't change equations or feelings or emotions or the need of the hour.

A man, to me is the strongest individual in the herd. One, who can shoulder responsibilities, think ahead of future; secures and safeguards everyone's interests, integrity and dignity, Trying to be better for others, always, selflessly! Hence, I am, and have nothing to be unspaken on that bitter / mal-corporate behaviour :) !

Thoughts for the day -
1. When established Protocols don't function, isn't it the implementation team's fault, or, is it the inability of the O/S?
2. With Great power, comes greater responsibility
3. Freedom means responsibility.

Long silence broken

2008-08-15T20:33:00.000-07:00

Lots of learning over the past few days.

My CSIM classes are cancelled today :( Never mind, I have to catch up with my Bulgarian friend, and his Japanese wife over lunch. Trying to make way for a quick photo session at Lal Bagh's flower show.

I started writing a parallel blog for the frustrated techie and an ardent analyst I am. I realise, that an overall improvement in picking calls won't guarantee a sustained good name :( I need to work on returning calls as well :)

Hope to write during my normal hours ;)

Mailing a post - publishing myself!

2008-07-30T03:44:00.000-07:00

I opted to mail post(s) to my blog, to avoid the undue silience at this page, especially for people who worry about my unreachability. I did so from office, and the ever-wrong, never-missing signature clinged to it, just as any infection. Luckily someone pointed my nice try. I didn't realise it would be this bad. Fixed ! So, I realise, I cannot post to my blog from office :(

Please don't blame me, if I make an inconsistent posting schedule. With hot aloo parathas & jilebis for lunch in this weather, I have nothing much to ask for. Office is occupying most part of life, and i hope, it continues to stay as interesting & occupying, as it is.

My phones, and the repair, I have four mobiles in hand and lost three to the fate of water clogging, rain ca ndo crazy things to phones. I rode to work today, to rush for a meeting with a new boss, that people told me not to miss :( .. I managed to reach JIT. But the chaos was avoidable.

I got the best compliments of my life, in return of my parting gift to George, a poem framed and signed by me. "You have put Keats and Yates to shame". Am glad I've been able to write, of late. The compiling exercise for Serah Caleb is pending. People predicted that i may be rich, at least of words, very soon !

I hope I thrust myself to release the book, on time, early next year. I know there are many, who'd like to relate to me, if i ever get to do what i intend to, successfully, some day, coz they're so frustrated with the procastinating lee :) ! Not any more to be !

For others ??

2008-07-29T06:20:00.001-07:00

Should this post appear out of my busy work day, for the invincibly optimistic good, I presume to be turning as :P ?

People, often the sincere ones, work up their way to find growth for others', before oneself, which is such a herculean task & so humbling an experience. May be a sign of weak in this competitive world (or) the confidence of surviving / shining any way (or) the want of nothing ?

The value is translated only when the recipient shows how glad he / she is, with what they got. It is not gratitude expected, but the happiness that needs to be seen, at face, which drives home, the satisfaction of doing things for others, of living for others.

Complaining individuals, often pose themselves to be perfectionists, and are gruesome to live with. The only difference being, that the true perfectionists are hands on, and don't wait until people do things, whilst the proclaimers, merely say, they want, what they want, the way they want.

The bombings, and the rains don't seem to affect me much. Reasons could be as much as these (or) just that they seem quite regular and normal in this nation now?

Something strange happened to me at Dubare, I returned without the ability to cry, or feel grossly about anything, call it enlightenment, or detachment. The moment i fell into water, and gasped for breath, throughout the rafting effort, there was something in me, which disappeared, got washed away. I feel lighter, despite the fact of having put on biological mass. I know am being a little too cynical about this, but this is just one of the dream sequence(s), akin to the Niagara falls following.

Four most important things departed from my day to day life, in the last few weeks. It all appears as a planned sequence of events. forcing me to believe in destiny ? Nay, never !! But am glad I lost all the dependencies, which tied me to my grounds. Life is new, and just as new as i have never seen it before. The sequence, to break the surprise, is Brad, George, then the something within me, and then Jon, who have left me to fight it after !

Am I being to philosophical ?

No.. not as much, just gearing up for the big race. As is said, the best innovation and ideas, are those, implemented in times of thins and tears. My course at CSIM starts this weekend, to run through the next 4 months. And I plan to join back CRY activities too this week. Samkrut and my music teacher will be stake holders of the remaining part of my weekends. Am going to accept the fact that I HAVE to wear braces for 8 months from this weekend, painfully, for re-aligning my smile. Not that I look bad now, but its all in the game, postpone be its name ;) !

With the usual trait of campus recruitment rounds, to begin at work, am looking forward to my stays at the closets of resorts, not sufficing myself with one that I had this weekend. Becoming a luxury freak? Probably yes, after the book freak, and then the style freak re-vamps.

Signing off.. this is hibernation

Reacting to pressure !

2008-07-21T17:45:00.000-07:00

The restless I. The guilt of not obeying myself, and yielding to whatever is demanded of, is there any other reason to feel disgusted about?

Well-wishers sometimes become trouble-makers, for they try to make you happy. They think they know what you need, but don't know what it would make of you. Sometimes it is parents, sometimes it is friends, and sometimes it is just the situation. Believing that every incident is a result of a situation, and no one is to be blamed, I forgive myself, the hardest thing to do, not just for Mr.Spidey, but moi aussi, rather anyone.

To fret out, I went on my random drive. As always, rain followed me. She does never leave me alone. I was screaming in excitement of being alone on the road, unable to feel my frozen fingers on the accelerator, I became a child again. Seldom do I remember that being alone is not as safe in this world yet. I reached home safely though. But definitely, an avoidable situation at late evenings, and I promise to obey my friends for this !

Thought for the day - Losing self-confidence on account of an external factor, means it has eaten you by itself. But why was it allowed to, in the first place? So, see, some questions dont have an answer.

My food for thought - What is the difference between living and being alive?

Disappointments - Unfulfilled wants Vs unattended needs.

2008-07-19T21:30:00.000-07:00

Depriving of that which is a need, is that which creates individuals who become dependant on the society, unable to be themselves. So, why do people feel so great about depriving people of what they need? Not aiding people to get what they need, is as much a sin, as depriving.

Lets help people rise upto their needs. The need is often of love and affection. That which is costliet.

Words of wisdom - Pencil Parable

2008-07-19T21:13:00.000-07:00

I attended the CSIM convocation yesterday. Felt like I am doing the right thing.
Listening abilities, are capabilities that seldom exist in independant thinkers, for I love to know what I think, than the others. May be, one can still call it listening ability, cos it is still all about listening to your inner voice, to yourself. But one must be groomed to listen to others as well. I have been lacking many opportunities to listen to imminent speakers / people I admire & respect. Now dont ask me, why am unable to admire one and all.
The words I remember most from those lectures are here -
Words of wisdom, to a Pencil, before it is shut in a box. You have to remember 5 most important things, says the pancil maker, to this new pencil, before sending it into open market.
1. To get the best out of you, you must allow yourself to be held by others
2. Time and again, you will go through the painful process of sharpening
3. The most important part of you, is, what is within / inside you
4. You may make mistakes & it shall be erased / corrected, because you're a pencil & not a pen
5. You have to live through, or grow out of your mistakes and acknowledge them too

Another line of wisdom - Start small, invest less, grow fast, scale out and not sclae-up large.

CSIM - Initiative

2008-07-16T03:59:00.000-07:00

Having bragged overly about all that I want to do, and start, and start, and do, and do, to work towards a social cause, and being an entrepreneur, together, I was much disappointed with myself, and the pace at which things are moving in removing dependencies. Such is the time, when I got a note form Deepak, that he shed his white collar to join Arghya, an NPO, (M not sure if I spelt it right). He was kind enough to get me introduced to CSIM, a wise step, when you are struggling to do something, and are also trying to battle with a secured life for your loved ones, which intentionally does not allow for freedom of quitting work at such an early age.

As this post comes in a hurry, I request folks to mail me in case you need nay clarifications on what this school would add to you. I met with Aruna Subramaniam, Coordinator, CSIM, Bangalore, yesterday. She can be contacted at the address / phone number given below -
Centre for Social Initiative and Management,
#418, 6th 'B' Cross,20th Main, 6th Block,
Koramangala, Bangalore 560 095
Ph. 2550 5197
The CSIM convocation for September 2007 batch is on this Saturday, 19 July 2008. The invite is here, for your convenience. This might be a good opportunity to know more, and understand the institution. Aruna tells me that there are a few more seats to fill the batch and she welcomes one and all.

Music, regressing my past

2008-06-28T05:55:00.000-07:00

My Music Teacher, Mrs. Nagarathna Shashidhar, gave a concert in our locality today, as part o fthe monthly music meet, in her private hall, open for BSK III Stagers. However bad a student I be, to her, she never misses an opportunity to give me that affecitonate motherly look. She sings and plays the veena, too, accompanied by her sons on Mridangam and flute. The venue is just a few streets away, but i overslept and lost my place close to her. The hall was already full. I came back home to listen to her from my vast beautiful backyard. Some people just humble you with their true modesty. I admire her, for, she is one of them. I think it is a virute of a relationship with Carnatic music, which is so divine by itself. The number of strings to be plucked, is just too much to learn from her. I promised her, that I won't return until I got my veena home, and finished lessons of yester years, as she was expecting me to be part of her annual concert series this year, and I disappointed her as usual. Hope this promise is kept and I make it the coming year. Dedication, is what I need to give, to this, noble, soul-rendering experience with her. She was rendering Guruvina gulama, and I waited for her to start with Tandanana bhala. I have only heard Rajesh Vaidya, and my teacher Smt.Hemavathi play it to that level of perfection. Mrs Hemavathi, a beautiful lady, widowed at a very young age, was always clad in white Saree, and vibhooti in her forehead. The only picture of Saraswathi, I can ever think of. There was something divine in her music. Her Prabhata naada in Madhyamavathi, always rings in my ears, as if Saraswathi were her, and the naadam from her veena is never reproducable. She taught me music for free, for almost a year, following my Dad's prolonged illness and my inability to pay a tution fee of Rs.100, a month. I remember those days, when she would make me feel utmost comfortable, with that extra special treatment as always. But guilt never spared me, and I gave up the art, for a part time job, with Mrs.Rajkumar Bharathi, for her new venture called Docsmith followed by CSC, Kumaran Soft and Brigade Solutions. Another lady who would humble me, as the first female engineering graduate, and first female campus recruit into L&T, married to such a great family, not a single streak of pride / prejudice. I lost my contacts with Smt.Hemavathi, after the series of struggle in making livelihood at tough times. Life & Music, are wrong priorities to contest! I sometimes feel I should have been a perfect fit for a Catholic, for guilt preys on me so naturally, else I could have made more out of those lean times with Smt. Hema. But this compromise brought me closer to yet another musical family of Dr. Rajkumar Bharathi's, though not for long. Hemaji, used to teach at Savithri Sangeetha Vidyalaya in Anna Nagar, Chennai. I went back to meet her, last month, but the school no more exists. It was closed down, following the death of Smt. Savithri, followed by her husband's a few years ago. Three kilometers by cycle, thrice a week, I used to look forward to those times, amidst my tution schedules.
Hmm, I rendered tutions to school students, as I hated to take money from my parents. So, it only seemed a natural choice to make more money than usual, when things went wrong, than sticking to what was passion. Life is so beautiful, and teaches so many things. 1994-till date, a life of struggle, work, and erratic transformations to me. I always wished I were a man, to do more & better, while, I was the weak, shy, religious, soft-spoken, introvert girl. She is completely lost now! I don't need to be a man anymore, lol ! I've learnt to play Jim Carrey to my fullest abilities, switching masks in and out. I just began to hate the corporate world, the one place, which never puts at ease, or comfort, the people who are different. It only exists on the paper as diversity rule, to force it, when utmost required by ego, which cannot stand erect in view of a crisis.
I remember discussing the inabiity to learn music, and Ram, who I guess lived / knew Kunnakudi / his students, said rightly that music.is a luxury to middle class Brahmins, who struggle to make both ends meet. He always thought he could be a good singer. Guess the same story repeats with many of us. Hope our next generation will get to see better days. the so frustrated I, consoled myself in his words and empathy, that I was not alone :)
Neverthless, I am happy, that I was all alone at home and slept like a log for over 18 hours since yesterday night 9.30 PM or so, if i remember correctly. I woke up for a couple of minutes in the noon, and slept back. Have to get my father's dinner ready, so, will get to cook now.

Dasavatharam

2008-06-26T18:11:00.000-07:00

One movie that created a lot of hype. Normally avoiding theaters, I rent DVDs to watch one single movie in bits & pieces over days, that's me. If such a crook were taken to a theater to watch a movie, then it better be the best. I wonder why my mom forced me to go & watch a movie this time, with her usual complaint, of me, not socialising or enjoying like others of my age do. I agreed to her, only resorting to a break from this routine stress, which never seems to diminish! .. Now to the movie..
P.S - I have only tried to take out my frustration of not being de-stressed, in the most cynical / comic way possible. If you don't like it, don't read it :P !
My expectations - I always rated Kamal for show-casing a combination of comedy, class and romance, that others often don't. None of these were seen this time. I saw desperation, restlessness to show "I can do so many things", as if he were going to die tomorrow, and this was his last movie.
Thinking for Kamal - The only justification to Mr. Kamal acting in 10 roles would be to substantiate his "Anbe Sivam" concept, "there's a hero in every human being". For all the bragging KS Ravikumar did on a TV show with Madan, this movie was absolute bsht!
Drawbacks -

Toooooooo looooong - 10 roles, each can sustain for 10 mins, i.e., 100 min movie and the stronger ones to story deserve 30 additional mins. Which only brings it to a 130 mins movie, seems less ? - add 2-3 songs for mass, (absolutely unnecessary though) , aka 2.5 hrs only. This movie runs for three full hours. Justified if I were glued to my seat, but i felt a thousand pins at butt after an hour. May be am just a lil too impatient as always.
Sin to Asin - BEAUTIFUL LADY, one can look at, for at least a few minutes, if not hours. They let her run errands. Not even one good close up / cover shot ! what a waste of time!
Dance - They let Jayaprada do the dance .. "Hello Madam, this is not thakida thadimi thandaana" ??!!??! "Samjhe kya ?"
Kamal & Punjabi - Haaye mai mar jaawaan! Tamil speaking tight tongues can never let words play loose on them. "Punjabi was stressed in between Kamal's lips" - no pun intended, but that's the only comment i could pass !
X factor missing - Typical Kamal pun was missing !
Kabilan - Great lyricist, good poet. But what was he doing in this movie? Couldn't they accommodate his talent in writing a few scenes / words for Asin?
How does love happen - Okay okay.. now I know everyone knows how it all happen(s/d), but why couldn't they add subtle shots / gestures during this whole chase!
Graphics / video game ?
Background score & Music - Himesh? wtfh! wouldn't Devisri/ARR/Harris/Yuvan do great?
Make up flaw - Fletcher's make up was melting in many scenes, esp around the eyes, watch the scene on road with
Too narrative - Many scenes could have been cut off, during the second half
Poor Comedy - But for Balram Naidu's role, the crew wouldn't have a place to hide their face
Atheist Kamal Vs Theism, on screen - I don't want to see him introspecting on screen, he could chose his drawing /study for that!
Cinematography - First 15 mins is PC Sriram, then, it is PC Sans Sriram !
Technical flaws - Vehicle chase.. ?? look at the cars, illogical and virtual image concept is basic physics for a camera man ain't it, the shots in many places, esp the lorry accident has virtual images in consecutive frames ?? :P
My sincere piece of advice - If you have 4 hours of your life, to waste, and can wait at a cinema hall waiting for a climax epilogue to end, for about 1 hour, trying hard to catch a good glimpse of Asin, go ahead !
Thathuvam - Spent Noota-Aravai, kai iruvai, verum aruvai!

Noota aravai means the number 160 in telugu.

Random blabber

2008-06-25T12:42:00.000-07:00

சாமி .. உங்களுக்காக மொழி பெயர்க்கும் முயற்சி ஒன்று ... mostly naalaikku complete panniduveain.. let me get back to my desk to work.. yep.. am still at office !
காற்றுக்கு கடிவாளம் புகுத்தி வாழ்க்கை பயணம் தொடங்குகிரேன்
அவள் கை கோர்த்து நடை பயில, முழக்கமொன்ரை ezhuppugiren (am not in a good sense of dictum to translate it now...) .. so let me try it later..

In love, smitten, ye Serah, smitten Cahleb,
Of thy presence, words profuse, do ebb,
Let unheard be those, spoken
And heard be this far, unspoken
Until horizons leap, to the burning sun,
For another morning that is just as fun,
For 'Tis, a night to come and let be frail
As loved ones live a turmoil off grail
In hopes of living for maiden love in life
Dreams depart, sans love to, words of strife ...

नींव की कहानी

2008-06-15T01:49:00.000-07:00

गुठलियाँ बोते, रासते जीवन के हैं मापने।
गठरी बाँध चली, लिए मुट्ठी भर सपने॥
खरा उतरा जो नैनों से, होने को कलमबंद,
लिखने पर बनें स्याही से, कागज़ के ही छंद।
दिखे न चाँद, न बादल, न अंधेरे मे नदिया।
हर नज़ारे को प्रकृति ने जैसे प्रेम से बुन ढोया ॥
प्रेम की छाया छाई नाचती हुयी कली-पत्तों के द्वारा ।
जैसे पिय से मिलने, हवाओं का लिया सहारा॥
धरा की चुम्बन को हर डाली है तरसे।
मुडा हुआ तन, मटका है, फ़िर से,
झुकी-झुकी सी अम्बुआ की तरु
कहती, "कुदरत से नयन मैं बचाते हरून!"
नींव से गांठ बंधा यह रिश्ता परखने
आए बरसने यह गरजते बादल भी घने
न माने जहाँ इस प्रेम को पावस
कुदरत भी इतराके कहे इसे हवस
बिछड़ने निकले चीर ज़मीन की छाती
सीना ताने हुए खड़े, हम पेड़ और साथी
न तरु धरती से मिल पावे, न आसमान छुआ जावे
नींव और तरु की कहानी कहे, प्रेमी बिछड़ न जावे
सूनी हवाओं की ज़बानी, सुनो नींव की कहानी
कहे कभी ममता की छाँव, खोते नहीं हैं धानी

Sneaking off oafees hours - some crap !

2008-06-03T06:03:00.000-07:00

Sneaking from my desk & picking at this internet enabled system, safegaurded, as a Shaman's secret in a different floor, now is a herculean task to, me, who, as Jaspal Bhatti describeth well, runs into a meeting to decide the venue and topic for the forthcoming meetings ! lol ! now you all know when you get paid in those five figures, absolutely for nothin new but for doin no harm !
I just gave a whole blast gyan session to my boss !! Am a bad coach, but he was a good listener I suppose ! Am exhausted now, and ready ain't to work !
My pain subsided, during later part of last week, and I stacked up the week with a travel. hectic week really !! I went to Pune, rather I flew. I spent on an air travel on myself, for the first time (dont ya hear me scream ??) !! Given that my company made me fly this airline until I became the King clubber, I couldn't ask for more, with some royal treatment.
Devana-Yell-EEE.. excellent experience finding my way into the new int-errational airport. I was quite impressed by the roadways to this place. Drooping for an early morning flight, I only found the building enough to be called the scavenging room of such a hude initiative. To blow away my blues, there was a Barista at level I, and I sipped into my coffee, easily comfortable with it being hotter than I usually assume it. I also peeked into those stalls, great clothes, but no time for me, I was scraping through pages .. Hey now don't assume I was carrying my diary, ich been exactly 17 months since I touched it. This blog is the total sum of all that I can perptually afford to remember without hurting anyone, rather myself much !
Pune.. is a nice place .. but felt as if, a few Peshwas slogans chasing me to "Shibhaji Mahratta Mahraja Padhaaare hain !" .. Wow, my, what an old city.. let me do justice, a historic city !! Food there was splendid, I managed to goof around on the streets all alone (now you have ot believe me ..) only for sometime though. When I say goof around, I really did ONLY that ! I watched a couple of gentlemen (mawwali's) drown into Gaanja and play taash pattha (Mangattha as in Tamil). I was more than welcomed to watch them, and one of them even showed me a trick, I was presuming to be a photographer ( I didn't have a memory stick on ;)) ! Kehta hai, "Ben, photo mein chaapoge.. ei dekho..". Boy, had they found it out, I was just in for some spurious action.. But not much of a chance, cos I just stopped by to drink some lassi at a road-side stall, by which these folks were enjoying a game and chuska, and almost everyone was overlooking them !
I was really reminded of Sat, rather missing his company to create any mischief, the next time, I am around, I'll make sure, I have him aside (and thats not as far as 12 june) !
Sami - Another blog I love to read, that of a jubilant personality I know of http://dailyrium.wordpress.com

Words

2008-05-24T13:53:00.000-07:00

"I have been astonished that men could die martyrs for religion—I have shuddered at it. I shudder no more—I could be martyred for my religion—Love is my religion—I could die for that."John Keats (1795-1821), British poet. letter, Oct. 13, 1819, to his fiancée Fanny Brawne.

PAIN !!

2008-05-14T12:32:00.000-07:00

Exorbitant PAIN, summarises life ! I landed up in the O.T for the first time, for a minor wisdom teeth extraction process that usually takes about 40 minutes. I was at the OT for over 2 hours. I know many of you folks are in line to get this done. A sincere piece of advice, warning and instruction -
The dentist will only tell you that it might pinch you. but, believe me, he is ABSOLUTELY LYING ! This process has exactly been a month and i am hardly able to chew anything, or speak properly, or even seeing any reduciton in the resonating pain between my jaws, neck and ears. Adding to the wisdom teeth, was a gentleman in my fore jaw, who never emerged out. Hence some muscles had to be removed off from beneath my tongue, Result - 16 stitches, no food to chew, no mouth to speak and i have been on mute. TO add to this AGONY, is the radiating resonating persistent pain that causes headache / dizziness and fatigue, adding to lack of proper food intake / diet.
This whole exercise put me on to perpetual dizziness, as much as alcohol. Am doing better now though. And hence the silence.
Feels like Deadwood after this surgery, some even say, that my face has changed considerably following this mission whiz-dumb :o)

Spent time crying, rather, weeping aloud like a child. When tired of weeping, I'd go to sleep. When i wanted to resume office, i fainted a couple of times. The doctor apparently hurt the jaw muscle linking the neck. They say this is very common in an oral surgery and this muscular injury would do all this dizzy alcohol high. Thanks to my chiro, she fixed it all this weekend. She corrected my muscle alignment and it worked wonders. So folks, you know what to do. Never trust your dentist. He is enemy of all peaceful existence :(
Keep shooting mails.
While I type this, i still feel the pain beating me to death. No point mumbling, I better live through it.

Civic citizen - Apply for your Voter ID

2008-04-15T20:04:00.000-07:00

Apply & Serch for your Voter ID - A sensible note from Amit Sahu

How many times you have thought that it's time to change the system or think that Govt is not doing it's work properly and you strongly wanted to do something to change that. But when the time comes for you to vote, you are not able to vote because you are not aware whether your name is there in voter's list or not.
Now here is a very simple way to know whether your name is in voter's list. Just check out this website address given below and get to know whether your name exists in Bangalore's Voters list.
http://164.100.80.122/Search/
Note:- your name may not be shown exactly same because in most cases there are spelling mistakes. Just provide minimum options for search i.e. three charaters of your name, Gender and pincode and then search for your name. Also it's not Mandatory for you to have Voter ID card for giving your vote. It's sufficient if you have your name in Voter's List.Best if Luck .
DO YOUR DUTY RATHER THAN CRIB ABOUT THE SYSTEM AND SURELY THE SYSTEM WILL CHANGE.

CIVIC Bangalore - Presentation on Kasturirangan Committee's recommendations on 19/April/2008
It has great pleasure in inviting you to a public interaction on the Kasturirangan Committee Report on a new governance structure for Bangalore & Manifestos of political parties on Bangalore.
Dr. A. Ravindra, (Retd.) IAS, Former Chief Secretary, GoK, & Member, Kasturirangan Committee will make a presentation on the Committee's recommendations; Response by Prof. B.K. ChandrashekarHon'ble Chairperson, Karnataka Legislative Council; Responses & presentation of party manifestos on Bangalore by Mr. P.R. Ramesh, Ex-Mayor of Bangalore, KPCC (I); Mr. Srikanta Murthy President, Bangalore City Unit, Janata Dal (S); Mr. Vijayakumar President, Bangalore City Unit, Bharatiya Janata Party; Mr. M. Muniyappa, Karnataka State President , Bahujan Samaj Party; Mr. Venkatesh Bangalore District President, Samajwadi Party; Mr. V. Balasubramanian, (Retd.) IAS, Former Additional Chief Secretary, GoK, & Advisor, AT Ramaswamy Committee; etc., will preside. The event is on Date: Saturday, 19th April 2008
Time: 10.00 AM to 1.30 PM
Venue: Institution of Agricultural Technologists, Queen's Road, (Opposite Sanje vani), Bangalore 560052.
This is an invitation from Kathyayini Chamaraj Executive Trustee, CIVIC
Programme Schedule
10.00 AM: Tea and registration
10.15 AM: Welcome and objectives
10.20 AM: Presentation on the Kasturirangan Committee Report by Dr. A. Ravindra
10.45 AM: Response & Presentation of Citizens' Charter on urban decentralization by CIVIC Bangalore
11.00 AM Response by Prof. B. K. Chandrashekar
11.15 AM Responses by political party representatives & presentation of their party manifestoes for Bangalore
12.30 PM: Open discussion
1.15 PM: Chairperson' s remarks by Mr. V. Balasubramanian
1.30 PM: Vote of thanks & Lunch

CIVIC Bangalore (Citizens' Voluntary Initiative for the City) - # 6, Kasturi Apartments, 35/23 Langford Road Cross, Shanthinagar, Bangalore 560025, Phone: 22110584 / 22711001 /41144126
Cell Nos: 98803 97401, 98809 63996 and Email Id - www.civicspace. in, civicblore@gmail. com

Morning menace !

2008-04-09T20:50:00.000-07:00

I was so tempted to listen to this number by Backstreet boys "So let me show you the shape of my heart". I sprang off my walking routine and cam home to bug my mom with high volume music. I have Mellifluous melodies (now playing.. Makelara vicharamu) by Unnni, Kenny G, Backstreet boys and Metallica being shuffled perfectly well. She is kind of agitated with this combo I guess ;) Never mind, I love bugging her !
Hmm.. I did not quite do justice when I wrote about my friends. I only spoke about the folks from whom I whacked or borrowed (soft stealing) material belongings. I just am too obsessed with my friends list. I should pull a page with a photo list of the most wanted criminals on earth (Criminals, yes coz they encourage an element like me :P)
When I go mute, there are a handful, who go all the way to reach me. Such a stress it is ! Gokul, Arun, Sandhya, Sami and Eyokesh are examples ! How can I not mention them ! Thank you for giving me the space folks. Guess you guys are spoiling me much by pampering too :)
I complete three years in my current organization today !! Tough job, excellent team built, and very demanding role. I saw challenges, performance, opportunities, growth, sustainance and am not too far from seeing stagnation as well ! All I learnt in these years is, "Fight to build the respect and pride for YOUR people". To do that, one has to first, respect the other person much more than oneself, beyond the tags of education, experience, etc., In short, appreciate, cherish and celebrate the diversity and difference they carry ! Then there are minor things like ego, which automatically vanish, because you have a goal of helping them gain their pride. And what more, you feel so happy. Finding happiness in others' joy is the key to success and bliss !! One must understand and let people be the way they are, and must still be able to make them do things, which were difficult otheriwse, without changing them. Tough, but not impossible. All it needs is time, will, trust, promise and soul !
There are folks who preach to let go of ego, let go of paranoia, etc., the task at hand will not work without a driver / motivation, which comes from a person's values. Leaders who preach must also practice what they preach, which I often have found to be lacking. I am still waiting to find a great mentor, who will vest his/her time in me, and let me see beyond my issues and the world of my job, to grow better as an individual.
Lest, should I be forced to realise that I will probably be a better self-motivated introspective mentor than someone else, who shows, but has no values or will !!
I wish to myself, that career will dimish the amount of work done as an employee to nix in the next year ! Tis time to change status buddy !

Life - Knowing myself !

2008-04-07T20:49:00.000-07:00

Folks, What I enjoyed most last week was, watching Taare Zameen Par (I borrowed a DVD - shame on me) !! But for someone who takes over 3 days to finish watching a movie just once, I don't think anyone has an alternate answer ! Yep, I borrowed it on Friday, I completed watching it yesterday night. The movie was fabulous, but just that there are "N" other things that disturb me ! So, people might now understand, why i insist on going to a theater when it is a good movie. I watched "The Myth" and "Knocked up" as well. No where close, but I had to do the carbon dating on myself to see how historic, a social being i am now !
The boy was amazing, kudos to him. The Music deserves 10/10. The dialogue by Aamir on "Khayal Karna", that's the highlight of the whole movie.
Down the memory lane - Not a sentimental reaction to this movie, but an alarm that rings in my head to keep up the promise I made to myself. The lines coming forth are probably the most intense self disclosure / realisations I have shared with my friends. Some incidents may have been repeated to folks. To say I am a dyslexia patient or that I am a prodigy will be to humour and belittle myself :P, A small remembrance of all I could have done in my life, but for the race of career never hurts though. Nevertheless, I will find my time to do all the blissful nothings, which is my promise ! .
The middle class man in India, can seldom imagine his child to struggle in his day to day life, for it is such a disproportionate competition in our world. Languages, Darwin and Keats would fascinate. I remember the entomology freak, who collected insects and buried up to 300 species of flowers in diaries inspected for malice. Education was not difficult, but just not so interesting / challenging. I remember Miss. Padma Iyengar at St. Anthony's who punished me in class (class VIII) for forgetting my homework on poetry her classes. The punishment was to write a few lines, and I gave her a four liner on the word "I forgot". I don't remember much of it today. "Alas, I forgot to see her moan unto death" was the last line of it. She beckoned me into her staff room, the next day (now this was a nightmare considering how strict & highly respected she was). When I was in there, she looked at the crappy piece of paper I submitted, and asked me "You ?" and I nodded in accordance. She simply said, "I am impressed". She never spoke a word after that in any of her classes, where I would be in the last bench getting my scribblings converted into legible writing by Hema Malini. My one friend who kept me writing. I loved the way she encouraged me. She had a beautiful voice and what more, she looked so so beautiful, akin to her voice. Something divine, that made me feel pampered like a kid. Her recital of "Ramuni naamame athi madhuram", still rings in my ears. Wish I could meet her. Like my poems who, I lost to my adamant ways of shunning / destroying things (whenever I had foreseen any threat of people severing me from my most proud possessions), I lost her too. I foolishly remember the number of diaries discarded with words most admired by my friends and I, in a class of 70, just to support my adamant nature. Amar Saxena always quoted this to me, "Offense is the best form of defense, so very naive and a child like quality in every human".
It is true that, people who care about you, those around you, could be unreasonable at times, when there arises the question of your focus drifting from the very means of survival. Thus, an aspiring social activist, javelin player, athlete, dancer, musician, writer, journalist (Above all, the poet, in simple terms (no exaggerations) an artist !) turned into a responsible elder sibling, a good son (??!!?? - ask my parents :P ) , analyst & manager - Not a bad fake though :P

Am sure everyone has had similar such memories, for India has been in need of the work force. Artists who would fill the motivation and entertainment zone for this work force were not required, as there was enough motivation behind the daily struggle of survival itself. Art was predominently replaced by a single fractal of itself, the film industry. Tough competition for literature who wears no make up :), and poetry lost its charm, (only temporarily !!), Educated minds are trying to read now, for they want to be read as well :) A great welcome change !

Going back to life, crazy things have been done, and the horse succeeded in its race overwhelmingly, for the loss of time, which belonged to the "who, which is hidden in me". I hope I get to mend life, before I say "The who, which I was !". Leading oneself out, and showing ones' true personality to the world is the sheer responsibility of every individual. Waiting to be excavated, only works on monuments and not mankind :) Now, if that is a reason motivating enough, go find yourself for the world to see :) Wasn't my February deadline all about this ? Prioritizing others, for yourself to be free !

CRY News !!

2008-04-07T20:26:00.001-07:00

School Yesterday

School Today

Now that is what I like about Manesh, he is prompt in sending these cut outs. Also a side effect of RTI. I agree with Manish on this that media pressure brings on the world to its feet of action. But one must admit, that we / the media is getting better at identifying problems, sufferers and victims. What we need is a solution and action. No one wants to hear a sad news / bad news. News now only remains to mean sensational. People want to hear about success. To make these news items turn around and act, I think we need to do our bit as well.
These snaps really ties me back to try using RTI. For the benefit of our group, I would like to recall my recent introduction to a group called AID in the US (group of Indians) and their efforts to understand RTI. The reason to mention this was the question "When people remotely placed are able to see the weapon in our hands, Why should we miss out on using this ?"
I was tempted to react to Snehendu - I completely empathise with him and understand that it was sheer agony reflecting, not only in his words, but in every individual's voice, "on why media is not all that responsible". But we merely bragging about the problem probably is not the solution. If one thinks we need to do something about a problem, then we must discuss & solve. I personally feel we all carry our bit of responsibility and need to do something. Some support / participation will help. If not the media, I guess we can all do something. Under this specific event, a) By filing an RTI against the school b) Try to find about the norms under which schools are given permissions c) Number of schools who have violated this and d) Actions taken against them
Dependency on media is not going to help us much, unless we do our bit. We can probably write about the results and educate people on how they can change things, than showing one new problem everyday. Though I agree that it is the media's responsibility to support and direct the public to solve their problems, there is nothing much to do, when people don't realise their responsibilities and act on it.

Sunday Samayal !

2008-04-07T19:52:00.000-07:00

People don't believe it when I said, I have been inducted into domestication, of late. Yeah, so unusual of the Tom boy. But after all the punishing experiences, there is a reward. I was able to cook so quickly. Sunday's menu seemed long, but I relish my meal when there is variety. I managed brinjal curry, Plantain curry (added the tamarind flavour to it), Tomato rasam (sans tamarind, now thats an achievement :P), onion sambar and there is this new thing I tried - Mango ollan (Procedure and ingredients are here for the food freak) -
Take 1/2(half) a coconut, grate it and grind with water to bring to the consistency of a paste. Take one cup of yogurt / curd and whip / beat it to the consistency of lassi. Heat 2 spoons of oil (prefer coconut oil in case you are looking for that authentic Mellu tashte) and add a spoon mustard seeds when the oil is hot. Once the mustard seeds begin to pop out cracking, add a few curry leaves and then the coconut paste to it. Sprinkle 2 pinches of turmeric over this mass, and let the paste boil. Add 3 green chillies (chopped of course). Add the curd now and then add a cup of sliced mangoes (I would say have a mix of ripe and sour mangoes to the ratio of 1:1). Then add salt to taste. Let this mixture boil until the mangoes have become slender (usually takes 10 minutes). Do not add water, of your paste loses consistency. The thicker the ollan, better the taste. But you may add curds to help yourself in case the ollan begins to reach dry state and loses the gravy. This would gain flavour as it grows older. This would remain longer, for as much as three - four days if the curds strains itself while boiling and keeps the ollan dry. Keep adding curds and feel the sweet & sour taste drip in to your meal !
I enjoyed food. Cooking can be enjoyed too, when you find your most delighted diner :) (definitely can be yourself as well). Cooking needs appreciation in the form of empty vessels :o)
As clouds clear up, I will come back with more soon !

Stronger of the duo, Bose & Gandhi - A Zombie's introspection !

2008-04-02T20:30:00.000-07:00

Exercises of the mind never seem to stop. Absolutely tired me, with water gushing out of my eyes as I struggle to take this beast into control of sleep. They are not saline tears, but the result of the 7 sleepless nights which ended yesterday, and the void brain that has been depleting over the last 8 weeks of hard work. Unable to look into the monitor, yawning and rubbing eyes like kids with morning blues, it feels great to know I am not drunk, yet feels like my body is enslaved to white rum in blood. What melancholy this brings, and I don't want to miss the opportunity to forget the world alike, and become the poet. That poet who rarely existed after March'07 for all reasons good to believe.
In no order, I recollect Victor Hugo's words - "People do not lack strength, they lack will !" and Mr.M.K.Gandhi quoting, "If your heart acquires strength, you will be able to remove blemishes from others without thinking evil of them".
What Irony, I was thinking about my favorite leader SC Bose which triggered all this here. The fact that Gandhi(ji) was a reason to make him appear a failure in history, while Gandhi(ji) reaped all the fruits of "British hatred" against Bose, always hurt me. The question that drive this exchange is, "who was stronger ?". Both indeed were. Tolerance and courage, are two sides of the same coin named strength, akin to the concept of "the victim and the player". Some one's concept which has taken deep roots into me. One can very simply derive this from the words "Karta" and "Kaaran" from Bhagavatam, than following this wild-west concept. I will not debate much about that yet. Tolerance is a virtue, for, someone said to me, that, being a victim is the easiest to do. So true ! According to me, what differentiates tolerance and the victim spirit, is the vision and the end objective.
Going back to Gandhi(ji) and Bose, both men carried an impulse, the end goal was same. Bose's impulse faded for lack of sympathy of people. It is indeed a smart move for Gandhi(ji), to follow ahimsa, and non-violence. But the vision and the picture which drive this impulse, have to be made clear to people, to win the sympathy. Which is what Gandhi(ji) did. Both men had the same impulse, both opted to die for the Nation, both needed followers. But people also chose, to follow to their convenience. Gandhi(ji) chose death, with more options (Pain or life or death or humility), while Bose would always land up into 2 choices (Life or death). People were only clear about the choices available to them beyond life and death. Selfishness pays off ! But the biggest proof of similarity in these two men, is Gandhi(ji)'s slogan "Karo ya Maro", which came from the former, the ideal reflection of the latter's state of mind. If this was truly interpreted and some tolerance was showered on people who chose to follow Gandhi(ji), but do things differently, I would not have felt that Gandhi(ji) digressed from obvious points of speech. He did not fight for his fellow men blindly, but he fought for his ideologies and dreams about his fellow men. Often feels like "My way or highway". Exhibiting tolerance and the ability to see people without blemishes, would have been clear to me, if I read Veer Bhagat Singh and not Shaheed Bhagat Singh in history. It would have also meant INA as security at Dandi March and Jallian wala bagh ! The difference between these two men, is the way they handled things. One was a complicated man like the "offer subject to terms and conditions", while the other was a plain offer. Customer centrist played there as well.
Dhananjay told this to me, "Certain good things need marketing" in a different context though. But I realised the fact that SC Bose needed it too. I love both these men, for they succeeded in what they wanted to do, one was a catalyst aiding Gandhi, with the hatred & fear he instilled in the British, who ran to the non-violent mass. Both I feel, acted like Dominique and Roark in of fountain head. Each neither able to hate the other, nor able to admit the fact that they want the same things, done differently ! Opposition was support they best offered to each other ! The answer to the question of "stronger who ?", lies in the fact that one still gave away the place in history, for the other to bear the torch, without any complaints or confrontations.
When I say Bose, I am so close to him, the uncommonly common man, and am not forced to say Boseji, but when I say Gandhi, I am forced to see either the Mahatma or Ji behind it ! Such a frail government we have, who is so unjust to the leader, who gave us the Army, so vital to our nation and the only reason we still are an independent nation, and not a bunch of colonies ! Both deserve their due respects, but I don't want to distance myself from Bose. Like Keats, Darwin and Einstein, Bose will be with me !

TDI - Absolutely Awesome !

2008-04-02T19:58:00.000-07:00

Eight Daze - I am in love with this and have literally been drooling! I too will buy a TDI someday, if not an Audi, definitely an Indica form Tata Motors is possible :P (no comparisons please :o) )

Mon Chere Amie !!

2008-03-30T09:33:00.000-07:00

Think about this - "The solution to all problems is just the birth of a new one". Call it an opportunity !

Brain quote - Are we all in pursuit of drawing greater lines against our greatest lines, just to make ourselves look better ? ( Not my words, but the concept of a Tamil 1960's movie called Iru Kodugal)

Yep, thats babble and a beaming-lee drowned in nix of wine undined ! One fine morning, when I return from a turmoil of work, I find this wrapped in the most dirtiest colour of sponge, and I didnt know what was so heavy in it. I unravel a Fossil. A first non-titan, non-hmt brand I am wearing. Yes, "I am wearing it", it is a gift from Kadups. Despite the fact that I don't like gifts, he sent me one. To be frank, I felt annoyed first, but felt cared later on. It did feel happy, but gifts and favours feel too heavy. I only want to give and see people smiling. Now I have to become rational that others can think of giving to me as well ! To be frank, a greeting or just a pen would have don't the same effect ! I just realised how ruthless I can be with people like Amar & Gokul, where I don't hesitate to flick anything or ask for any favour without bothering to return any. I am such a selfish brat with them. After all, they are the best I have ! I didn't even bother to thank Kadups, that ncreases the propensity to include him in the list. I am a shameless creature :( in deed. And Here I am bragging about my friends :)

But the real reason behind not making a call, is just work. The fact that I dont have enough time to make that call to show my happiness is a testimony. How much I show off my blackberry and the watch to folks, is just amazing. Another thing is the broken wall clock, designed and handmade by Sat. It hangs in my hall to make our house seem a little old enough. But thats what I love about it, I show it off to every visitor who has a question about why it is there amidst the perfect & human things, andthen I explain beamingly, and show off Sat's paintings :) People now see me wearing a watch, and ask me "Oh you too started wearing one??" (the real reaason behind this question is the loss of 4 Titan raga's to my habit of removing my watch just anywhere and most importantly, forget it to my convenience. May be my wrists are so very delicate to bear a watch ;).

But everytime I look at my watch for the time, I say, its my friend's gift. And everytime I have a black berry, people know Amar :) My life is all about my friends, and the pride I take in them. For they make me so strong and bold. Then here I am, daring to do just about anything, to live upto my integrity and standing for the right.

The chaos that work has done to me, for reasons so obvious and those away from the blog is immense.

If this is the greatest challenge that life has give me, then I am in for more buddy !

I finally accomplished the best task in vogue, an escape travel to Wayanad on 18 March. The first family vacation ! Not the perfect one, but nearly there ! More soon, keep writing !

Missing Brad, the brother brat whom I could speak just about anything ! The last dance on the farewell party reminded me something that I could only do it with him :) My perfect Michael Jackson partner :) Thanks to George to pulled me off the couch, atleast 5 times to break my own vows of not being bad to my back. Truly Mon chere Amie ! God blessed me with so many friends, who just let me be myself !

Life on track

2008-03-07T01:39:00.000-08:00

F* !! I just lost a whole page I typed while formatting. Twice bitten already :( I hate it !! Sorry folks !! It really had some interesting and rather useful information on it. For now you may have to look at just this !
Apologies for the unparliamentary slang, but I couldnt hide my fustration. Neways, I can only laugh it out, while I think about Osho's wonderful speech about the word itself ! Will post it sometime.
Someone is playing hide and seek with me. Good option !
A few people have their lives covered in chocolate wrapped papers and its too hard to guess whats going on ?? Eventually, it appears that I am trying to crack into a few people's lives whom I have lost touch with :)

3 new-borns, with 2 on their way, 4 send off &/or welcome parties, First birthday celebration, Family get together and a nice small trip I promised my parents for. Thats all March is about !
Mr PC's pleasing budget, a complete analysis of my version of US recession and world, an excellent win over Aussies by the Indian cricket team. All these were goodies I accomplished ;) in the last two weeks.
My much promised Serah Caleb, and the calendar for charity have been postponed indefinitely. The most painful part of life, begins with a man whom you can neither condone, nor construe ! I probably will learn to call it an OPPORTUNITY !!

Laze et Craze !!

2008-02-18T02:29:00.000-08:00

Resting at home !
Manchester United, Chelsea, Liverpool and Arsenal teams in my drawing room !! No mommy at home to switch over to TV serials eithers :) .. What more do I need !! Haven't been able to meet anyone in my list in the last three weeks. Doing nothing seems stressful too !!
Landed up cooking full meals everyday, for myself, dad & sis, in absence of mom. No office, yet the day seemed full, for three weeks now. I still have a list with none of them checked off !! I need to get back to my physical strengthening routines and correct my damn posture at office.

I want to retire in another 6 months :P .. Watched Vineet Nayar on TV, see this is how the idiot box can fill your life. My manager must be thinking that I am off to some mischief. Corporate life is getting a little sluggish and always accompanies boredome with it !!

Am looking forward to our family get together in chennai in early March ! More soon !!

CRY - Right to Food; and BSNL in my life !!!

2008-02-12T06:11:00.000-08:00

Finally on internet !! After 9 complaints at 1500, and over 20 calls to the Div Engineer, here I am successfully back to the talking world. My efforts of getting things done from one place went futile :(

While I am still recovering from the painful life, checklists don't seem to be diminishing, but it all seems to be moving !

Brain quote - That which is done has nothing to be undone, but what is right is not right to the wrong and the wrong is not wrong always !

Responsibility - I enrolled as a volunteer at CRY, who impressed me greatly post their change in outlook from Relief to Rights in their CRY. We are currently working on mobilizing and aiding people to ensure that the anganwadis scheme run by the Govt are being run properly. But the Govt is trying to privatise this effort by letting third parties into it. Please read the actual NEWS that appeared in HINDU about this. Though I am not physically mobile, I want to help this movement as much as possible by collecting people's views which will later be used as part of RTI applications / survey results.

I have been listening to mixed views. PLEASE comment on the same !!

My thoughts - When the Govt has RTI, the people still have a hold, the RTI cannot be enforced on III Parties, its just another loop hole / idea to still be corrupted. One more layer added to CNF (Corrupted Network Force)
1. May be it is also possible that a few genuine bodies may do better than the Govt. !
2. It really may not be possible for the Govt. to manage w/o proper network / infrastructure / funds.
3. It may be just fine to limit ourselves to ensure that the Govt enforces adequate rules / makes provision for direct supervision under RTI to get things going. Publishing these list of centers to interested parties periodically, may be mandated as well.

2008-02-02T05:31:00.000-08:00

Ami down with severe back ache due to all the heroic travel :P.. Dr. Jack Stowe is treating me in absence of Dr. Shailly Prasad. Expect to meet a few important people this week. One item was checked off from my list today. More is yet to come ! Getting things done sitting at one place is a great challenge, but am learning Ti the rite way !

More Life !!

2008-01-30T21:58:00.000-08:00

Thanks to Manish, there seems to be more to do in life !! Not sure if anyone had a chance to watch this debate. I missed it out !

Sanjeev Dada wrote this to me - "A person who knows that 'this' is not it, knows that he/she does not know what it is, and when one does not know what it is, then what is it that dies? ... I liked reading your blog. "

That was an excellent one, typical Dada style. I still remember teh presentation he gave about Deposit Behaviourization, absolutely no change.

Dada - I'll counter it this way .. If change were constant, then that which is changing, is change itself and nothing else, then why change oneself for a change which changes .. constantly ?

C Donkey is getting engaged tomorrow, and I have a cousin's house warming ceremony in town. I wish I could skip both for all the muscle pain, but I have to attend either of them !

Errata !!

2008-01-27T21:55:00.000-08:00

Hectic weekend as usual ! No regrets as I love keeping myself busy.

There is a strange thought, I have - Death is eternal sleep, and why would I indulge into it everyday, for life is short and I want to live, rather do as much as possible ! On the contrary, I land up spoiling my health. What is the minimum hours of sleep required for a person whose metabolic rate is pretty high ? Am not sure !!

Tilu - Thank you so much for the information provided, you really eased me out of an incomplete thought in my mind. I will take it up early next week, when I start on my much awaited vacation of 30 days to get the Feb 20 deadline rolling !

Chandru & I visited Shivaprasath & his family, His child is 5 months old !! phew.. late visit !

With lot of emails, unreturned phone calls and visits pending, I am looking forward to the vacation. Someone said this.. "I never find time to do all the nothings I want to !", I really liked it. I think thats the best way to put efforts that dont lead to internal satisfaction / those small happy moments. Isnt life all about this !

As I keep typing, my mom is beeping the time like an alarm, 11.20, 11.25, 11.30.. and one more, She'd drag me by my ears

Someone conveyed a message in unsaid words, "having cheated, I feel proud, for, its my birth right". Of late, I found lack of core values in many people. Deriding genuine integrity, and never feel responsible for any act, some people never seem to have a conscience ! Lest, should people be fooled or allow to be taken for a ride !

Today's strike - Social responsibilities & my plea !

2008-01-21T21:16:00.000-08:00

A heavy market correction, slide in the sensex, broken infrastructure, and a Nation to stand up, nothing seems to be enough a reason to the cab drivers in Bangalore. They are on strike today also, and apparently there is a buzz about a hike in Auto fares, which hints towards another chaos / havoc. But I am not worried about the commute to office, as BMTC offers excellent service. But what about those, whose support 24 * 7 operations ? It is a nightmare without cabs. May be BMTC should start thinking of special night services to avoid the cab miscreants and to back up in case of such incidents. But the uncertainity lies in the fact that our country is infested with the concept of strike at every walk, and BMTC is no exception.

I can even chose not to work today, but imagine the BPO's they have operational nature of work. Every minute delayed is costly, not alone in terms of $ billing, but also the credibility to retain & attract business. Every delay and wait leads to customer dissatisfaction across the globe. The impact of such nuiances is a frown on the client's forehead, and questions to follow - "Is Indian work-life so uncertain ?", "Does this recur in Bangalore ?", "How often does this happen ?", "Is there any violence involved ?".. and so on. And why won't they, it is at the cost of a few fellow countrymen's security that they have posted jobs out here with the faith across miles that th ework will get doen undisrupted at a lower cost to justify the job cuts & pay cut decisions taken by their managements.

It is not alone the Cab strike, there are a lot of other disruptions to this, including social & political riots, natural calamities add to this. For a few other cities, terrorist threats add fuel to the fire, which come unpronounced. Thank God, we in Bangalore are a little away from this bite !

Now we all know that over 60 % of the tax payers are from ITES, and are dependant on projects & assignments from overseas due to outsourcing / off-shoring decisions taken by MNCs.

It is a bitter truth that all the GDP we produce is not beacuse of our advancements in Manufacturing, Agricultural or Mettalurgical sectors, but due to ITES. It is the responsibility of every Indian to safegaurd this source of income, and uplift the respect of our country. It is also true that we cannot expect professionalism from our fellow Cab drivers and Auto-walas. But it is our responsibility to create awareness and lead discussions & debates among comman men about our country's economy, in more simpler terms. The importance of professinal life has to be conveyed. While there is no time to educate them and reform this country to start working on its own development, there is no shortage of . Let us exhibit social responsibilities and educate people whenever & however possible. I don't know what is the responsibility of the Govt., and am not sure if they would find time beyond planning for their positions & elections to have their jobs well done !

All I can do at the moment is to blog, and discuss this with colleagues & cab drivers (of course when they return back to work) !

There is a line "Endru thaniyum indha sudhandhira dhaagam ??", I think it was V.O.C or Subramanya Bharathiyar, who wrote this. This tamil line means, "When will my thirst for freedom be quenched ?". Gandhi quoted, "Independance is not freedom from foreign rule, but the elimination of dependancies of our people on others, for their basic necessities". The struggel to have our own food, shelter & clothing (medication, security and techno advancements are far to think of !!) is still on !!

After 60 years of independance, if a 28 year old I is forced to remember this line, I dont know what to say, but I just feel like getting down to clean up everything. I hope we all realise this, and work our way to improve situations.

May be there is no need to get so dramatic about this & ITES, but the development of Mexico, Canada and China as strong competitors is an invitation for us to pay our dues of duty. It is my plea to one and all to serve your responsibilities better, until situations change and the table turns over for us to control our own economy & the world's beyond ITES.

There is a lot to do, and very less time for it is too late already. Let us get our hands to work at whatever we can do and behave like citizens !!

A note to my friends - Please, don't say "sorry" & "thank you". All I expect from my friends is a little consideration that I may be busy and to forgive me when I dont respond on time. Also to help me when i do something silly and don't know how to get out of it :P !

Ideas for INDIA

2008-01-17T23:42:00.000-08:00

Well conceived concepts and passionately implemented ideas seldom fail, is my belief. So, please feel free to add your views / comments / debate on the same.

Advice is free, but ideas are valuable; If you don't, someone else will take them - Hope mine reach the right ears !

Sidelining specific stores that I have been following (Total, BIG BaZaar, Ponam's, Spencer's, SKC, Food World, Westside, Shopper's stop, etc., to name a few), here are a few ideas I would think, Indian stores can capitalise on. I did not intend to dole out, but they ran a little too long due to enthusiasm. Now to the list -

Stores need more billing counters, at least 1 per 1000sft. especially when more people flock to them
There is an aura at established stores like Shopper's stop which has to be maintained / enhanced & followed by the new ones
Brand building certainly needs more concentration to tick on for long enough

A few Ideas / suggestions to achieve the above few points are (May be limited to the apparel stores) -

Stores should be able to attract / place a few snack stalls, juice centers to aid tired shoppers esp., when location around doesn't facilitate this - happens in purely residential areas which avoid unimaginable crowd
Indian stores must consider having in-store dress designer - NIFT / dress designing students if hired as store keepers / trainees might aid them better !
Stores should look at makeover sessions / suggestions to help customers chose new / latest fashion clothing to personalise sales effort
Fashion designer day of the month - gather young crowd who try to balance between the homely person & the hidden fashion buff
Women should be able to find a beautician to aid those last minute shoppers - Shop, dress-up & move ON !
India is all about installments, small savings - Add schemes to plan for festive purchase, as our traditional stores have been doing for ages - will definitely work better than the store ard approach :) !
When you are trying to build your brand against the giants, stores must consider offering taxi counters / cab facilities for those leave the store very late of course with a 15 minute notice time.
Children have very little to do, while parents end up doing more for themselves, lets try to handle them too :) A sincere advice to store runners on this -
Please do not add items to the store where young parents lose out while shopping for children and end up buying less / nothing for themselves.
Good adds may be a few games and / or governance places with a few crayons / colour boards.
To manage kids, one might as well charge their customers @ a handsome price OR try to offer it free to those whose bills exceed a certain amount...

What more, this is all I can think of :) ! As I never seem to run out of ideas, let me stop and save some for myself ;o)

I am looking forward to see our Indian stores going live & online. All I DREAM and want ALWAYS, is to see India soar high and penetrate into all sectors of business. I dream and expect that they set the right examples and beat the west to death :) (not in literal terms, but in terms of competition).

Fun links !!

2008-01-05T04:00:00.000-08:00

Fundoo Ad .. nice flick from someone's web-site ;) Ads always remind me of Yam Sat !

Watch a cool spoof here - Courtesy Yogesh BHAI !

Lazing around at home, sending emails and new year wishes to all those onmy address book is what am upto. Trying to get building plans sanctioned this week. Started my fitness routine again after a break of 4 weeks and jogged this week. There seems to be a need to build up my stamina, I just realised the effect of all those foody notes :)

Of Life

2008-01-01T09:52:00.001-08:00

Request on spotting a right place to donate old clothes -

Continuing the note on shopping, am changing my Wardrobe, and in the process, the first thing I did today, was to pull out the old clothes and gather them. I am looking for a place to donate them all. They are not at the state where someone cannot wear it. They're quite usable, a lot of them have been preserved well from my school days too. Please do suggest me some places where I will be able to make a relationship and donate them as well.

Life, a note for friends -

Personally, I am looking forward to celebrate MY NEW YEAR on Feb 20. To me my calendar will be reset on Feb 20, which is my targeted date for accomplishing a few personal commitments and goals.

Store Watch - SKC !!

2008-01-01T08:17:00.000-08:00

Wish you all a Very Very Happy and Prosperous New Year !!

A Chennai based store - I did a bit, rather quite a bit of shopping @ SKC on 31 Dec. While trying to make sure that I don't shop too much at a non-Indi store, I did a bit of digging and found a happy story here. Hope you find it nice too ! It is really a matter of pride indeed for a Tammie to see a proof of "Vandhaarai Vaazhavaikkum Thamizhnaadu".

On the other hand, the story behind the silent yet giant growth & penetration of Indian entrepreneurs into Prime and sub-prime markets is just scintillating. I am not a brand ambassador to this store, but I definitely want to promote efforts which beget quality and competition.

I also happened to watch the dancers perform at the J.C. Road store. They are really doing international stuff man !! Please do try to visit these stores. It is not too over stuffed, Its clothes and accessories and doesn't try to ape the Bazaar / stores concept. It definitely qualifies for a mall. I request you folks to visit more Westside, SKC and Bazaar. I will wait to watch if they sustain any foreign giant trying to gulp them away.

The SKC on J.C. Road is a good store overall. I rate it as below -
8/10 for ambiance and lighting
7/10 for customer service
8/10 for pricing
7/10 for the collection
9/10 for the space / area to handle the crowd
8/10 - Location (subjective - great for a shopper with a car, less crowded)
6/10 - Staff selection
4/10 - Marketing / Advertising - Not enough to reap profits to even run the store.
??? - Parking lot (I haven't explored the parking lot) - Please feel free to add your rating.

Drawback - Quite deserted with no stores adjacent to it, esp if you do not have an own vehicle.

I haven't been to the store at Koramangala either. But, for people like me who prefer Mal-crowded places and those who are Demo-phobic :P, the JC road store is a boon. If you are reading it on behalf of SKC, or another store, read THIS for suggestions / ideas !

India is on to take over the world - Great going INDIA !!

Festival Greetings !!

2007-12-25T05:23:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas to all of you !!

Questions I am trying to answer and places I need some help, suggestion / advice

How to build my own system ?
How to maintain your own web-site ?

Background-
I am in process of building my own web-site, one that will host the poetry craze, my own venture and social upliftment / support solutions.

And I am craving for a web-site which will be hosted out of my own LINUX system. I know, I need to google. But I will be glad if you can give me a few pointers. I am bad with CSS, RSS seems to be far away. I am comfortable with My SQL. To start with, I am trying to assemble my own system to act as a server.

Please do pass on the link to all known friends to help do the dues !!

Ideologies !

2007-11-30T08:18:00.000-08:00

Life, the way I see -
Life is a pool of miseries to some, to some its a lullaby and sonnet, to some its a challenge and to some they can never figure out what it is... Having been in all these states, time and again, the time itself let me answer and resolve myself. Someone said this to me, "life is a bag of time, you only have this much and decide what you want to buy of it". So true !! There are certain things who are you, your beliefs, which you stand by forever, because they are you. Then why not make them the pride and cascade it to shine for others as well.

Beliefs - Loving, Giving and Forgiving
I am someone who thinks and believes that a person who cannot fall in love selflessly is as good as inexistent. For those who are still trying, believe me, it comes only when you learn to let go...Life is the other name for giving, it is not material, trying to see smiles in someone's face, touching lives, shouldering someone's pains and respecting people for whatever they are, "WHATEVER" that's the key. If only all of us were to do this, then our dictionaries would have no synonyms for fear, terror and oppression for they themselves would not be words anymore !!

Alms and Arms -

Now we all imagined why a beggar is what he is.. but have we ever thought how he does that, it takes courage to raise alms, shed shame, and plea for what is in abundance created by nature for one and all !! At least i can never do it, for there is an egoist in me and a fighter who never gives up. But what if i were destined to be one, my heart just sinks at this very thought, this was even the state of people living in India before we got the erstwhile independence. Now, this is not a contradiction about ideas for encouraging beggary, I am a strong advocate of eliminating beggary and dependence myself, and I don't shell pennies in his arms, but what is wrong if you can see beyond the situation into their eyes and buy them a meal or food to eat when you have the time and heart ? Yes, its about having the heart to give. It won't save me 30% tax straight untoward, but definitely motivates me to stop hanging out in five star hotels and shopping at branded outlets. I don't confess that i have eliminated it, but every penny counts. This is of course to save money, but not for yourself but for others. Let us think beyond saving for a house and pension post retirement !!

From me to you -
I request you all to gift yourself the status of being "God to some". Give yourself the freedom to love and respect every being, feel the difference when someone eats that meal at the speed of light, which would otherwise suffice 3 meals for you. I felt it. Believe me, life can never be better.

Please don't take this for a lecture about hunger and poverty, or myself for a communist, I am not one. Its all about LOVE, giving and doing it yourself !!

Soke-da-zoke ..

2007-11-30T08:01:00.000-08:00

This is how a non-hindi speaking thamizh girl describes a chakli alias murukku while she is not all that well conversant in engllish. These names are hypothetical. One interation when a southie served murukku to her entire team filled with northies :)
Northie Namita - what is murkoo ?
Southie Saradha - Salty ... One circle ... two circle ... brown..... kara kara ....... deep fried .... Yes.. thats all !

Tiruchirappali - yil oru Naal

2007-11-25T05:51:00.000-08:00

Alas ! I realised what I was hunting for, some private natural space to write. If any of you knows some such place untoxicated of human romance practices, I would like to know of it for a safe place to write, calm in nature's couch.

The Travel - I cancelled my plan of visiting hogenakkal, (one place i thought will help me write about the haunting promontaries'). Even as I travelled, the right turn after of Kaveripattinam was still very tempting. I boarded the KPN at 12.30 noon to Karur on 15 Nov. It was a very very pathetic journey, as I reached Karur only at 8 PM.

Lavanya Kalyanam - To my dismay, I found none of our friends at Lavanya's wedding. Marriage makes women unreachable to their friends, I was always arguing against this, But it PROVED VERY TRUE INDEED ! May be tis time to check this premise with Lavy now ;) !

For the lack of thozhis, I hopped on to remain by her side all along, and picked up my usual job of the Bride's friend & assistant. I am getting an expert at it. The photographer was a pathetic one ! Chose wrong places to click poses, not enough natural lighting made it gloomy. I clicked as many snaps of her, the mehendi, hair dressing & make up. Such efforts are expended once in a lifetime and need to be captured at their best. I didn't do any great, but attempted it from being a faded memory. Lavanya's wedding photos, (please do peek at her jadai / hair dressing, it is awesome).

I don't know what would people spending hours at the mirror do :P if efforts weren't captured by the camera. I'd definitely drive nuts off the photographer for doing a lousy job ! Lavanya stood calm, cool and composed as always, That is what I love about her. All she did was took care of the make up and posed for me once again :)

Of late, I observed that marriages are translating into events of boredome to me, just another ritual ? Lavy's family treated me like one among them, i jelled well with strangesrs as usual, or there is better team work while under pressure :) Lavanya's Meesai Maama and Institute Aunty were highlights.

Tricy, in company of Sami and Alibaba - Having woken up at 2 am, I started running a parallel thread of where to head after the wedding, as couldn't imagine doing the attender's job all day, away from nature. Namakkal and Hogenakkal were the obvious answers only until Sami, Hari, Rams and his wife arrived at 6 am. While Rams & Co. headed home for Salem, Sami offerred to tour Hari & myself around Trichy. Not a bad choice, I gave in.

The wedding was over, we hogged at the breakfast table. Hari Babu had carried two pairs of clothes to eat as many times as possible without being noticed ~ jaJ. Moiyezhudhiya paname thanadhu mariyadhaikku kenja, unduvittu vandaar Alibaaba. Mattra Naalvarum perundhu nilayatthirkku paigalai sumandhu sella, Naan mattum en podhi moottaiyai aayasamaaga izhuthuchchendrean. Boarded a TNSTC bus to Trichy, it stopped nowhere.

Rest of the day in company of Sami (Yaaruchaami) & Alibaba alias Hari Babu, am obsessed with nicknaming people.

Chatter and the Miscillany - Kaveri and its distributaries (i didnt mean tributaries), on either side of the raod, Sami was delighted to discuss about the developments in the area during the British era. We then debated about why Namakkal district had to be separated from Trichy. But I must admit the British advantage point. There are railway stations at every village, to aid traders and vendors. I am forced to think this. Did we chase the British too late or at the wrong time ? On the same lines.. Version #1 (Historic) - They came, They saw, They captured, plundered and looted... Version #2 (Hypothetical ?) - They did come, they did see, they also wanted to live here.. with facilities they had back home ? May be they were bringing in much more than the freedom fighter could see, may be we should have asked for more than just setting us free ! We let them go easily without sweating for us. Never mind, we will entangle ourselves from the corrupted peninsula !

Trichy - There is something scintillating about Trichy. Trichy is another vacation home to me. Nothing unfamiliar about this place, but there is just so much more to explore. Hari and I booke tickets to Bangalore and Chennai respectively. It was not as hot as the place usually is. My train to chennai was at 10.20 and Alibaba's bus to BLR was at 10 PM. We then walked across the station to reach Sami's house. A lady greeted Sami as eppovandheenga Sami (Sami as in Sir and not his name) ? (chuckle it :)) . It is amazing to see the humble, affectionate and submissive eyes of my fellow tamil nattupura hero-heroines.

Home, Amma and Transit - We were absolutely tired. Sami's house was amazing. It reminded me of our ancestral house in Madhuranthakam. Lots of Sayee portraits gave a testimony of their devotional practice. It was amazing to note a few moral quotes alongside. The house was clean, spic n span. Hari & I were surprised to see the Video Casette Player, popularly known as the Deck :), I decide to re-name Sami as Tholporul Sami :). Sami's mom is amazing, she has had the presence of mind to click every momen tof their childrens' lives. Saw a lot of snaps very carefully arranged to capture their childhood. Parents look at these while kids are away with no time to spend or be together :) I was surprised that she did all this even as she was a home maker. Not to denigrate, but trying to guage the amount of exposure she has had or earned even during the 70's ( I am making a guess about the time here).

I must talk of this great lady, my dear Mother. Fancy dress competitions, photos, magazines, eating habits, our games and the courage she instilled, everything is beyond the reach & imagination of every lower middle class child. But most kids of my age, would have had the same emphasis on education I suppose. I must thank her, for I am all this today because of her single handed efforts while Dad was kept busy and challenged by his touring job.

A good lunch at Sami's house, Vatthal kuzhambu was delicious. I could digest everything but the fact that Sami's parents had postponed their lunch on account of us. I felt very rueful. At 3.30 we started off in a brand new Ambassador (Yoohoo it is still in production..and Man it is just getting better and better !)

Sami's amma and I made fun of Alibaba and Sami who thrust their faces on eachothers' unable to hold off the catnap. I suddenly realised that the other two were laughing at me as we landed up at Samayapuram temple. Excellent Darshan for a friday noon, (Courtesy Vastram Balu). Barricades between man and god get relaxed only in Tamizh Naadu. We headed to Thiruvanaikkaval.

Before I prattle, Thiruvanaikka - The legend is here - This sacred place houses his Jala (Water strength). The garbhagrriha oozes water of Cauvery, whenever the river is to its brim, which makes it special to this temple. This is a temple with 7 layers of prakarams, saptahrushi mandira according to Indian Architecture. Sami narrated to us, the story about the spider and elephant behind the origin of this temple.

While at the premises, we marched past the 1000 pillared hall, i.e., Ayiram kaal mandapam. Paaraigalin innoru parimaanaththai paarthein, kavidhai varigalukku velai adhigarithathu. Rocks, best etched to beauty by man. We worshipped Kubera lingam, Adi Akilandeshwari, Jambu lingam, Vigneshwaran and Jalakandeshwarar. We Got to see the Sura samhaaram as it was kirthigai. Then we headed to Srirangam.

Srirangam My Boyfriend's abode as I usually refer this. Am simply in love with this temple. 108 deities, the tallest gopuram. I wonder if I will go on the VII Raja Gopuram during my lifetime, to catch a view of the lanka. I tried to explain about the vaishnavite cult to Alibaba, about the alwars. Sita is in her traditional 9 yards bridal sari only at this temple. We had prashadh as we came out.

Ayyangar aatthu thamizhe - Topic of discussion as we ate was the terminologies or the different name given at this temple. Curd rice is known as Dadhi-Annam and Manjapongal is a saltless variant of ven-pongal. The reason to specify the food incident is to let people know of the specific names to these prasadams, well the daily colloqy of iyengar race. A few to note will be the thiru-k-kann-amudhu (payasam / kheer). Rasam is known as Sarth-amudhu and Sambar is called Kuzhambu. More funny is that vegetables are addressed as Kari-meedhu. Its fun to publicise this dialect. I enjoy listening to it :) even if people make fun of my complete chennai slang.

Winding Up - Throughout the day, we were lucky to get some undisturbed darshan time despite the crowd and the ad-hoc plan. I only felt blessed, pampered and invited into the temple :). We went back to Sami's house, had dinner there and Sami treated us to some delicious Dosa from a near by hotel. While I parted, Sami's mom hugged and kissed me on my cheeks. She told me that she was happy to spend time with me the way she would, with Sami's sister. I was so very delighted and genuinely happy after a long time. At a male friends' house without any discrimination or wrinkles of discomfort after a LONG time. Sami gave a lift to Alibaba in his Namma Ooru Vandi. Next was my turn, he exhibited chivalry and carried my bag until I boarded the train, unlike the morning :-P. At first, I felt uncomfortable as it was unusual to make someone carry my heft, but the relief off that bulk for sometime erased the discomfort. The cockroach laden train arrived, the usual thanksgiving and the sigh of having found new friends ready to move on made the day pleasant. The right remedy at a time we all felt shrinking from the loss of a few friends to the institute of marriage. Life goes on :)

Photos - Flickr, Kodak and Picasa

2007-11-11T03:55:00.000-08:00

Flickr Vs Picasa I liked picasa for the upload speed and Flickr for its classiness. I am going ot use both to make the most out of web. I would detest Kodak as it forces me to remember yet anothe rId and password. I actually have an account which I dont have a trace of. Here are my albums at Flickr and Picasa, most of them clicked through a VGA camera on my Moto L7. This is definitely not the best equipment, but ensures to remind of what was seen, even if not trying to bring those moments back to life !

The lazy lugger has fallen sick, so there's more to sluggishness !

The week of Diwali

2007-11-10T03:42:00.000-08:00

Wish you all a very Happy Deepavali, esp the thalai Deepavali ones !

Brain quote - There is always more, waiting for prioritization. Lest, should focus be lost for despise of time.

Lots of sweets at home, all mom-made, badam halwa, gulab jamoon, palgova, coconut cocoa cakes, rava laddoo, rava thattai, ribbon pakoda, manoppu... Amma samchchthu, kandippa fortune-la samaikkala :P, nalla mookku pidikka saapda veandiyathu thaane :) ippo saappadlainna aprom eppo saappadradhu.

Nice holiday season.. and hectic travel ?? Lavanya's weeding at Karur, Vijay's wedding reception in Chennai are coming up even as I've just made my pilgrim to Tirupathi, which I do so before every start. About the trip, I can only think of the food in AP and the quantity I gulped in for 5 courses of rice for 2 meals at BHIMAS and WOODSIDE. Gonkura, avakkai and pappu podi with lots of ghee, apart from the sambhar, rasam, kaara pachchadi, curd and vankai pulusu. I know you people would laugh at this, and say, five course of rice in spoons.. pity you don't get to see when I actually relish and eat non-stop.

A tired body insensitive to time after the 3500 steps, and a mind which wants to write.. ever since i saw this photo of balanced stones, and to my surprise, I found just too many of these in tirupathi on either side of the stairway along the entire trajectory. Not sure why it was there and how long it should have taken to do all that.. for once I thought it could be another superstition passed on, to think that such stones well arranged will fulfill desires. But as I trodded uphill, I was just surprised, I found few pathways in between these arrangements, may be a few souls were trying make way into the forests or making it easier for those who'd enter the forest after them. Need to find the reson behind it though. If any of you know it, then please do lemme know. Surprising that I experience similar things as someone and visit most of the places as someone does. Purely co-incidental, may be the two are haunting each other ! lol ! Ebony, Bangalore walk, Arun, balanced stones [i differ here though, am not one like this someone is :( ], virtual barber, music and some photos now. Am really into completeing a few poems over the weekend. All the rest have to rest.

Watched Karl Boyes & Roberto Gomez play Nine-balls game at the World Pool Championships 2007, excellent game, brilliant shots, Gomez was feast to the eyes ! New to nine-ball, pool & snooker ? I didn't want to redo this already done at Y! Answers to its best possible.

The TV remote was snatched off, and then I watched one of my favourite movies, Sillunnu oru Kaadhal... not a bad compromise :) .. Movie reminds me the debris of CDs I cleared, and I found a movie DVD which does not belong to me, I had to return it and I remember doing so, don't know how i missed it. I have to return it back, will wait for C Donkey to return, for another favour on me.

Love is so essential for a poet - It brings beauty from within and gives a different lens to everything one sees. Here are the last few words I wrote, while I was in love, I still am though, and words vanished along and I am struggling to strike the flow back. Then on, unsearching in Titan and morsel is the romanticist. Contemplating whether to make it public or not, for it belongs to someone who knows not what I think and feel. Love and bliss of you ! By HauntedLee

Today does matter to allsome

2007-10-31T19:39:00.000-07:00

The most happening thing is AWAKE and my process of answering the question, "Why are you not able to do what you say, you will or can or want to". The best thing a guide can do, initiate the thought process. While doing so, to check off the list, I finished my PGDBA Paper Assignments yesterday, and this process definitely consumed more of me than I assumed. Thanks to all these folks, espescially Vishal and Nirmala (Nima Prakasam), I managed to send them across on time. This is what is called Sharing Best Practices ;) a.k.a "copy shamelessly. I really liked the new ad by Google, "Search made simple". I cannot imagine a world without Google. For all, I forgot to thank google who helped me spot Vishal and Nima Prakasam.

While, am still waiting for a reply from Vishal & Nima, if I can point to their blogs, I can definitely speak of these sites, where I found my assignments http://www.esnips.com/ and http://www.voy.com/ Esnips and Voy are new to me & am going to spread the word. Esnips gives away 5 GB of uploading capacity. For all you know I may be the late-comer here :) Prior to this task was NITC, popularly known as REC Calicut. I was just wondering what has been happening to brilliance, which is the basic quality of our Nation's core. It was encouraging to know that the Govt. spends approx 400 crores p.a on the NITs. Are we still thinking of the shameless ones abroad ? Let us not waste time, I am sure they don't care about this. On my best bet they'd repay this in dollars to the Govt. "Use and throw", some gentlemen & women just don't care. Let us not drift away, going back to the quality of students, for a moment I wondered if India's population was listed at the Stock market. It could swing anywhere between 10.2 to 1200 crores in just 20 minutes. While Stock markets cannot withstand this, how could I ? Check this for actuals that all we Indians must really know http://www.censusindia.gov.in/

Real Question, I belonged to one such Govt. instituiton, Anna University at the SCSE. Where would I rate myself honestly ? I never played the scoring game well (??? .. CG of 7.0 is probably a bad one ??). Lest, should I stop cribbing. Fine, lets look at desirable qualities in a student appearing for Campus -

Get the Math & your fundamentals right

Understand all the subjects you learnt / studied

Thorough Knowledge of what is claimed as area of interest

Extra-academic interests should not be a mere reel of facts, WITH a strong strata

Know "what you want" and be Frank about your preferred choices and options

Sticking to one's values. Before that identify your core values

Not being biased, learning to be diplomatic

Strong communication skills

ATTITUDE -> flexibility

Ironically, Colgate Palmolive stock price prediction fetched me a job :( Enough of Gyan, the best is yet to come.

I couldn't stop clicking pictures at this, and later on, am off to a straight comparison of these two - Calicut

The fotos can be grabbed HERE - I did a nasty job, just learning to catch them fresh at sight !
One is the Detroit Airport and the other is the Calicut Airport, the best of suburban, rather non-prime airports I have seen in India. It definitely doesn't look like one though. At par with International Airports of the best Infrastructure.
Whoever said that communist & left states are a hindrance to progress, MUST see IT and this ..DETROIT here -

Irrespective of what political / economical game we play, as a Nation WE PROGRESS. Show me one more unprime Airport like this and I am going to party hard, and you win lunch at Krishna's.

Neways, am off to my dentist. I still remember the few posts I am working on. I only managed to MISS the 3 day trek to Sharavthi valley Nov 1, 2 and 3 organised by Mahesh, with participants being the amateur ad-hoc group. This was onething which I REALLY Wanted to do. Had Mahesh's email come to me a day / two in advance, today, I should have been there amidst rain, slush, a few strangers to make friends with, and my good old blood licking friends, leeches.

Aug mudhal 20 Oct varai - recon

2007-10-20T21:17:00.000-07:00

Injury and I - Counting 15 in 2 years !!
It has been quite a few weeks since I trained myself to remember passwords, But never managed to blog it up. One accident while returning back from a friends' wife's seemantham. A 2*3 inch wide cut on the anterior side of my right leg, just above the ankle. And I apparently had a silencer burn which was left unnoticed by the loss of flesh deeply cut to reveal the bone. The highest magnitude of physical pain in my life. It probably just increased my tolerance limit ! I just managed to recover and jump around trying to forget the scar it has left and the inability to add a few skirts to my wardrobe, that Santosh managed slamming the cab door on my right hand index finger. Here I am with a fractured hand. My productivity just got halved. Waiting for the bandage and the pain to disappear, to start wondering why my finger is of a different inclination than it was before ! Mom is doing better, but the shaadi drive is a very difficult one to escape from time and again !

This reminds, I haven't quite satisfied myself with the narration of the adventurous night-drive to Mysore yet. Once done will post it up. It was an amazing one. The word "Letz Go" does magic, and I re-assured to myself that I still am as experimenting and adventurous as I was.

Life, a quick shot
Life has never kept me unchallenged. These days aren't indifferent, Prioiritization and Focus are my Mantras for now. Am waiting to take a long break to do nothing but brood over, gazing at the sky, the wall and the beach. Suddenly, everything (work/career, home, family, finance, friends and health), all of them seem to need a fix ! All at once is definitely not possible, may be, but each task in itself is so unpredictable of its deadline, that I have no choice but to multitask while I curse myself to look for a more relaxed life-style after treating myself to an average of 19*6 hrs work week for just over 7 years now. Lest, should I be happy making a simple list and striking them off.

Project Manager ParamasAvam - (It isn't I)
While continuing this thread, as I am trying to manage life, I sometimes wonder if I need to learn Project Management from this Gentleman who would even write his Autobiography as a Test case :P and frame life in a project plan. Thats probably the lighter side of it, but just shows how much I detest the situation of being a planner so close to the Japanese ! All others trying to "Ape it" to perfection are wasters of time.

That was NOT to offend any section / class of people, but just trying to think my point aloud, that people are good at DOING what they THINK they are best at. Context - When s'one doesn't even try thinking in those lines (of being the best), justice can barely be pronounced (esp for people like meih) !

Going back, never mind, I'll learn it too, or will learn to compromise on my appraisal rating GLADLY :o) or is it simple enough to create more and more excel files, irrespective of work done, to be a high performer ? Hahaha ! This occurred to me because I heard someone say this "If your boss likes it, then give him more of it" .. But that is just so much Anti-Me and against the idealist-Lee .. probably a few common folks know this man, but please don't quote it elsewhere ! It is supposed to be unprofessional then :)

Doing a job of a calibre way too below yours' is a .. curse ?? or reminder to act ??

Vadivelu Vaaththi -
Wanted to mention this definitely - me and my mom are obsessed with Thiru.Vadivelu's jokes these days. Reciting them in every possible conversation we pick up, seems to be a ritual now, lol ! Amazing guy & great talent ! For people who don't know this guy, check this -> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vadivelu and http://www.vidilife.com/videos_vadivelu (Side-effect of TV programmes telecasting comedy tracks continuously ??!!)

For once, I really pity people who are unable to enjoy his timing, the slang and the beauty of Tamil as an ultimate language for comedy timing, against the common complaint from our beloved Northies that "Speaking in Tamil, sounds harsh to them, like a scolding". I've been hearing same comments about Kannada too ! aargh, huh ! Neways, this can be a separate discussion altogether on why people do not attempt to be a Roman atleast when they are in Rome ! Some manage to live all their lives across generations and never pick up the local language, now Kannada and Tamil, must definitely sound a scolding to them !

Campus Galatta - Innoru Raggingaa !!
Suratkal REC during first weekend of Oct 6,7,8 I guess. Did not go to the Mangalore beach, shame it !! Manjarun was a great stay. I just loved the break despite the back-fill of worries about mom's illness. It was a break off from routine. Managed to miss my flight to Managlore and got into Deccan. We offerred to three of them. I just realised, I was a great student at college, my fundamentals were amazingly strong. BJT, RF Oscillator, NPN, Modulators, 8086, Algorithms, Von-Newman's Architecture, Lattice, Discrete Math, Codd's ruls, VSAM, HSAM, and Maurice Bach pages flashed by. C, OOPs, C++, JAVA and LexnYacc .. leave alone DBMS where I just cant stop bragging about woww !! I felt happy that my parents' invested in the right head :)

Literally ragged everyone with all the topics and more based on their score cards ! Was very disappointed at the standard few responses I had got, but this definitely will kindle a lot of funny and happy memories of college days. Planning top write it up definitely !

A must mention - It was the first time I flew after the multi-disk bulges from last year. Friends would be glad to know this. I sustained it and haven't visited my Chiropractor in the last 3 months ! Not a symbol of pride at mal-attendance, but definitely a sign of great days ahead as this is a testimony that I have completely recovered from the aftermaths of my accident in Jan'06. Shame on me, I havent treated my Chiro and cleared my past dues yet. Too busy ?? guess so !

Thank you for all those who made my Birthday a very very special one this time. Someone quoted "I've been waiting for this day, for, this is one day I get to say HAPPY Birthday" i.e., can wish me happiness genuinely ?!? huh ?!? Lest, should this victim be thanked for not attempting at creating happiness as promised !

Innum enna seyya pogirai - anbe anbe
Uploading Photo collection, Hosur, Net4, Meeting with the Prophet of Small Scale Industries, Ayush and Dentist are waiting to fill the rest of my weekend !

PGDBA Assignments, LIFA preparation, CFA vs CIPM investigation, Self-evaluation, Bank work and a few leaves this week to chase Hosur work is definitely on priority.

Will be back with more, sooner than I can may be when i get to realise that both my hands can type indeed. Until then have a great week /end ahead folks !!

TV serial weekend or documentary ?

2007-08-12T09:36:00.000-07:00

The lazy lugger is awaken as always, contemplation is chasing me away & the i tries to do the same. Never mind, the egotist went to the concert & stayed up for an hour, Sanjay was splendid, looking smarter than usual and attaractive as well. May be deserves to be called a crush, hope he doesnt consider this as an insult. "Ganalola, venu ganalola" was rendered beyond perfection and for the curse of being a single lady andthe constraint of reaching home early, I had to spring up in the middle of the concert. Felt guilty as Sanjay's eyes were spanning at all those who were leaving the hall. I was caught in the frame as well. Most unsually, he stared at me, as i was leaving the most unusual incident, that I left a concert mid-way for the first time. Rather i only felt that he stared, like the old school master would look at the kids escaping the PET aka PT (as Shruthi corrects) classes and he did the same to others probably (Guilt does kill baba.. chuckle it, I hope Mr.Sanjay Subramaniam will be reading it sometime & laugh at it, may be a good show off to his better half ! lol). Have been staying with kk alias Shruthi since the last two days.
apparently the Bangalore NICE road is the best place to drive @165 kmph, testifies abhi and kk, cos they had to do something to feel high as against me feeling high about attending Sanjay's concert. But mobility just improved. Have been running errands to the bank for a favour i promised to my friend. Return tickets from Trichy aren't done yet, no phone with me yet. getting the balckberry unlocked has just become yet another task, time consuming really ! there is globalisation about everything, and universal brotherhood in every silly verse, and speech, but a single black berry / now the bulk berry, cannot be universally useful, now i am forced to think why did i have to whack it from amar. While i am waiting for the night drive we all planned for, abhi is testing my patience, with this ends this week's episode. I am trying to find shashank's mobile number, the great historian new friend. i dont know the passwords to my email either and there i am lost as usual. Office and monday, for once, its not that worse a nightmare, for is just a three day week. Thanks to Aug 15th, we enjoy a day off, irrespective of how shameless we atre (atleast i am) in being happy about a holiday and not working to enhance it. Ok ay folks, thats all for today's TV serial.

Re-living !!

2007-08-07T21:23:00.000-07:00

Another bright morning, trying to reach Sanjay Subramaniam's concert over the weekend, travel planning & fund management for the mortal, haunt me !! Excited about the rest of the year for the days to come, that there are smaller work weeks inspiringly, but will this time beget quality in me is questionable. A poet is looking to flee in search of harmony with nature, where words would spring from the inspired rocks. There is enough of everything, seeking difference in altitude and experience, at work, in words, time and people. But change is within, needless to say. Static energy and I, the driver is missing, the wheels and the vehicle too (chuckle) !! Abstraction is me and clarity is undoubtedly disturbing to those unsearching bliss and myth !

Love is so very the content of poetry that lives in romanticism.

The debatable strata of my mind today, is, "time is fixed". Thought, experice and feeling, the mind, body and soul of life, all race for the same time. Who gets to kill time, of course is the body. Where should one live is so amazing to excavate, and resolve, but the answer unfortunately is, experiences just are. Thinking about the feeling, feeling about thoughts and actions, both are invaluable, for they have no bounds of time and they live forever. But the fact remains that one loses experiences, while thoughts and feelings quickly creep around your arms binding you to be answerable to time that was given to you.
In a world, where i think and feel, i evade the experiences unknown. I realise to be held responsible for rehearsing & undoing what could have better got a thousand chances of re-take !!

Not to brood over much, the conclusion says, enjoy what you feel, for it is experience, question what you are unable to enjoy, for it is the power of thoughts, live aside people to unravel what others experience even as you have no clue about it, thats the power to feel !!

While Serah Caleb is still emerging out of my mind into the paper, I am evolving just to be !!